


Loving you

by She_Who_Shall_Not_Be_Named



Category: Adam Lambert (Musician), Tommy Ratliff (Musician)
Genre: M/M, Work In Progress
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2012-03-25
Updated: 2012-11-21
Packaged: 2017-11-02 12:24:53
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 16
Words: 34,279
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/368948
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/She_Who_Shall_Not_Be_Named/pseuds/She_Who_Shall_Not_Be_Named
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"No rushing, no pushing, no fucking you tonight or tomorrow or the next days until you’re ready, just us taking baby steps together...."</p><p>Sequel to "Loving yourself", for those of you who missed it you'll find the link just below. </p><p>Feel free to leave a comment :)</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [Loving yourself](https://archiveofourown.org/works/315024) by [She_Who_Shall_Not_Be_Named](https://archiveofourown.org/users/She_Who_Shall_Not_Be_Named/pseuds/She_Who_Shall_Not_Be_Named). 



> After having finished my first fanfic “Loving Yourself” many of you asked – some actually begged (lol) - for more, for a sequel. It felt right to write this sequel, right to trespass once again in and onto the bond our boys share with each other. Like any sequel, the story stands on its own, although for the bigger picture reading the first part could help you guys. The story starts with the last scene of Loving Yourself.
> 
> Remember this is a fanfic, keyword was and still is FICTION, so no point in stalking, bash and trash the boys and/or their real life partners. Adommy was, is and will always be for our entertainment and I for one, am still very happy with that!

_Making his move, his very first move, all on his own, in his own pace Tommy kisses first, even before Adam gets the chance to sing that last sentence, his lips are covering Adam’s. It’s his tongue that play’s with Adam’s, it’s his tongue that is making love with Adam’s,  it’s his passion that is being poured into Adam’s willing mouth forcing him to bend backwards to break off the kiss._

_The girls in the crowd are going wilder than ever before, screaming out their adoration for all this hotness on stage, camera flashes are doing even more overtime._

_Victor and Jacob, who are watching backstage, look at each other, understanding each other perfectly. They know it, the same way both Adam and Tommy know it, right there and then, their souls will be ok … They will be ok._

Without having to look down Victor reaches in his bag pulling out his camera, double checking if he had an extra pair of batteries and memory card before checking the settings on his camera. He had felt Jacob’s eye’s on him as he went on with his business. “Adam asked if I could capture on film the connection linking them all together. He might have been speaking about mainly off stage moments but look at them. Look at them, they _are_ a family, all of them.”

Jacob nodded silently, understanding exactly what Victor was saying. _No wonder he was so worried about the Ratliff chap._ “Got your backstage card?” He asked Victor as he looked over to him seeing him rearranging it so it was visible through the pocket of his shirt.

“As you can see.”

“In case you need anything, go and find one of my men and ask them call Big Daddy. They will all understand.”

“Big Daddy huh?” Victor couldn’t hold back the giggle. “Ok, I’ll keep that in mind.”

“See you after the show?”

“Probably.”

Victor went his way, taking position just next to the stage, having a beautiful open view of both the crowd and the stage. Moving his camera in position he took a few pictures at random making sure the settings were with the program. Satisfied with what he saw on the screen of his camera he went to work.

The show was a tremendous success. The crowd has gone totally wild specially after their Fever kiss and they never came back down from that high level of energy or was it that level of hotness. Adam and the band had tapped into the crowd’s energy as they had done in theirs. When the encore was finished and the band and dancers had taken their final leave from the stage, handing over clothes or instruments to the roadies in return for drinks and dry towels, they all jumped on and over Tommy and Adam instead of going for their ritual group hugging and high fives after the show. They all wanted to know the details behind that kiss.

Taylor pocked his ribs. “Wow Tommyboy that was some awesome kiss! Did you hear the crowd go nuts?!? I mean that was sick man!”

“Welcome to big boys club.” Terrance said showing the huge smirk on his face.

“Dude!” Monte poked Tommy’s shoulder. “You guys really went all the way tonight! I could have sworn some girls wet their pants when you guys made your moves.”

Adam and Tommy couldn’t help but laugh at that last comment and neither could the others albeit it for other reasons then Adam and Tommy. Since they were all hugging each other no one would look twice seeing Adam taking Tommy in his arms and pulling him close. As they got lost in their moment they were unaware of Victor’s presence. Taking one shot after another, not just of them but also of the band and dancers. They were all behaving so naturally silly, high on adrenaline, so still in their own little world Victor knew the pictures would be amazing and perfect in their imperfectness.

Adam had been clear on what he wanted. He wanted to capture the emotion, the bond, the absolute craziness that was his and his Glamily on film. He wanted the story behind the picture, the real life connection not just the on stage and for-their-entertainment connection. It had become clear to Victor with their kiss that the on stage connection was every bit as real as it could get, it was part of their real lives and so he had spent the rest of the concert shooting pictures. Capturing the little things like that genuine huge smile on Adam’s face every time he had his back turned to the crowd as his eyes caught a glimpse of Tommy, the grin Cam and Monte had shared, the obvious yet invisible blush on Tommy’s face as Adam walked over to him, the pure joy on Isaac’s face during his solo and so many more. Oh yes, he knew the pictures would be exactly that what Adam wanted.

He noticed them hugging and turned his attention on them for a while. It may have looked like any other hug they’ve shared but it wasn’t. This one was different, it felt different, the way their hands held onto each other was different and the way they tried to get even closer to each other was different. They knew it and so did Victor and he was going to make sure he caught in on camera.

“Tommy.” It was said so softly it got lost in the cheers and giggles the others were making. Tommy didn’t move, his head against his chest, his hands grabbing hold of his shirt trying to pull him even closer. He ducked his head a bit more and spoke again.

“Sunshine.”

This time he did get a reaction, two brown eyes looked up to him telling him so much without a single spoken word. Just as Tommy was about to say something back they were interrupted by Neil.

“Adam, the meet and greet starts in 30 minutes. If you wanna change or freshen up now’s the time.” 

“Yeah. Ok thanks.”

“Come on T, let go of the poor boy will ya. He’s not going to vanish into thin air for crying out loud.”

Tommy couldn’t help but laugh at Neil’s comment. “Go on you mighty sexgod! You go and meet and greet all those lovely horny chicks.” He had let go of Adam’s shirt as he had spoken.

“I’ll text you when I’m done ok? We could hang out later tonight, maybe catch a movie?”

“I’d like that. Now go on will ya or Neil’s gonna kick that glammed up ass of yours.”

Turning to his band he went on. “I have to go guys. I’ll see you all later for drinks alright?”

“Sure thing Adam! You’re so paying tonight! ” Brook and Sasha waved him off as they all stood there,  still high on adrenaline going over the events of the show acting like a bunch of sugar-hyperactive kids. After a while they all made way to their dressing room. The dancers’ dressing rooms were at the end of the left corridor while Adam and the band had theirs down the right corridor.

Just as he came out of his to go the meet and greet he could see Tommy, Isaac, Monte and Neil coming down the hallway. The four of them laughing out loud over something and it was obvious as they came closer they were trying to convince Tommy to join them for a night of Playstation.

“Come on Tommyboy! They’re going clubbing later tonight, we’ll have the bus all to ourselves! I’ll join you guys later and then you and I could team up and we’d whoop their ass.” Neil said cheerfully as they walked by Adam.

“Sounds like a plan man, make sure you bring beer with ya!” Looking over to Tommy Isaac continued his plea. “Come on bud, say yes! An evening with the boys, it’s been a while since we played together.”

“I don’t know guys, still a bit tired from when I got sick.”

Part of him, his brain, wanted to say yes, because these nights with the boys were awesome! A bunch of grown-ups loosing themselves in a game, acting like a bunch of brain-fried teenagers, was a whole lot of fun. The other part, his heart, wanted to say no, hell it screamed no.  Being, spending time with Adam was what he longed for. A warm feeling rushed through his body as memories from the night before came into mind. A voice snapped him out of it fairly quickly.

“Dude, you have insomnia for fuck sake! Since when has being tired kept you away from playing with us?”

Adam couldn’t see Monte’s facial expression as he said it but he was sure he had his ‘I’m-a-dad-I-know-better-kinda-look’ and he was right. Tommy loved playing with them, it wasn’t the first time the four of them had stayed up all night playing some shitty war game. Up until this day Adam still didn’t get it, how anyone could play those damn games for hours and hours was beyond him. He grabbed his phone out of his pocket and sends a text.

_‘Go on baby. Have fun tonight!’_

They had the next three days off here in London before flying back home to the States, checking into their hotel in the morning. Tomorrow was the only day he had stuff planned; a meeting with the record company and some interviews leaving him two days to fully enjoy Tommy’s company starting tomorrow night with the much looked out to bowling battle opposing the dancers to the band.

The meet and greet was just about to start when he felt his phone vibrating. Taking it out he saw Tommy had replied.

_‘You don’t mind?’_

He quickly wrote back. ‘ _Just go and have fun will ya. Be sure to let me know who won. xxx’_

_‘I promise! xox’_


	2. Chapter 2

The meet and greet went on way longer than planned. Posing for pics, signing stuff, hugging fans, he loved this up close and personal time with his fans and yes it helped keeping his mind from thinking about Tommy too much. The Make-A-Wish foundation had made a last minute request for a meet and greet with a fan and he had really taken his time with the sick boy. The fan, to his surprise, turned out to be seventeen year old Jay who was accompanied by his parents Sophie and David Kinkella. Adam learned Jay had been diagnosed with an inoperable brain tumor and had little over 6 months to live. Meeting Adam was one of the first things he had written on his bucket list and his parents had moved heaven and earth to fulfill their son’s wish. He had gotten so touched by his story, by the joy and light in his eyes, he had given his email-address to his parents and asked them to keep in touch.

When Jay and his parents had left he finally sat down, tiered from the show and the 2h meet and greet not to mention he was getting hungry. He was about to get up again when his phone went off, looking down the screen it flashed Victor’s name.

“Hey Victor.”

“Adam dear, I’m not interrupting anything I hope?”

“No, not at all. Just finished the meet and greet. What’s up?”

“I’ve been uploading the pic’s I’ve taken this evening cause seriously after that kiss you shared on stage I got really, really inspired.”

“That kiss… Yeah, that was ….” He didn’t finish his sentence, slowly blushing as he could almost feel Tommy’s lips on his.

“That was something alright! Did you eat yet?”

“No and I’m glad you mention it, I’m getting quite hungry honestly. Tell you what Victor, meet me at my trailer in like ten minutes. I’ll order something from the Food Corner for us. ****

“You’re on! See you in ten Adam.”

“Great!”

Ending the call he noticed he had received two texts from Tommy.

‘ _Heard about the Make-A-Wish fan, text me if we all need to come over for pic’s, it would be our pleasure.’  
  
‘Miss you……’_

His heart warmed when he read them. He wanted nothing more than hold Tommy in his arms right now, it had been a very emotional meet and greet with Jay and he could really need someone’s arms around him. He replied as he was walking over to his trailer.

‘ _Cannot wait to hold you in my arms baby… xxx’_

He could see the lights were on in the bus his band shared, there was no doubt in his mind they were all teamed up already for the ultimate Playstation battle. As he walked closer he could hear laughter and music coming out of the bus. He couldn’t help but smile at that, it made him feel good knowing Tommy and his friends, were having a blast. _Have fun Sunshine, kick their ass!_ Adam and Victor arrived at the trailer at about the same time. Both welcomed each other warmly again with a hug.

“Adam! That was one hell of a show!”

“Why thanks Victor! Come on, let’s get inside.”

Both men entered, putting down their jackets and bags on the couch.

“I’m going to order something to eat immediately if you don’t mind, I’m just too hungry right now. What would you like to eat Victor? “

“It’s already late, a salad would be nice. You think they have Niçoise salad?”

“Euh… Don’t know honestly. We’re about to find out.” Picking up his phone and calling the Food Corner.

“Food Corner, good evening.”

“Hi, it’s Adam Lambert here. I would like to place an order and have it brought up to my trailer.”

“No problem sir. What would you like to have?”

“One Niçoise salad and one Winter salad please. Also I would like two bottles of water and a diet Coke.” Looking over to Victor he asked. “What would you like?”

“Diet Coke, thanks.”

“Make that two Diet Cokes please.”

“Sure thing sir. Would you like anything else?”

“No, that will be all.”

“Thank you sir. We will bring it up to your trailer in about fifteen minutes. ”

“Great! Thank you and good evening.”

“You too sir.”

Victor had already taken place on the couch in Adam’s trailer, placing his laptop on the table waiting for it to boot up. He looked at Adam inviting him to come over as he padded the seat next to him.

“Let me go and change into something more comfortable. I’ll be right back.” He had already showered before the meet and greet, thankful right now for the fact his dressing room here came with its own bathroom. It had made him late for the meet and greet but then again rock stars were allowed to be fashionably late. He had changed into a jeans and black long-sleeved t-shirt but right now he wanted the comfort of a pair of sweatpants and a cozy hoody.

Walking back into the small living room he took place next to Victor who looked at him with a meaningful look in his eyes. It wasn’t until he looked at the screen he understood why. It showed a picture of him and Tommy. Both of them looking at each other almost drowning into each other’s eyes, their hands almost touching, bathing in the blue light of one of the stage lights.  He had no idea when it had been taken yet it said it all.

“There’s a lot more where that came from. You all gave me great material to work with.”

Victor opened the file on his laptop and active the slideshow-view. Neither one spoke as frame after frame displayed onto the screen. A knock on the door pulled them back into reality. Adam stood up walking over to the door to let a girl from the Food Corner in. She placed both trays on the table once Victor had closed his laptop putting it on the far end of the couch.

Adam tipped the girl before closing the door behind him. They ate their salads, making small talk conversation as they went before cleaning up the table and getting back to the order of business. After the first look on all the pictures he was surprised to even found pictures of the meet and greet with Jay showing the loving look in his parents’ eyes, the way Jay’s face had lit up when he had talked about his dreams and the warm hug they had shared before saying goodbye. Victor had handed over a piece of paper and a pen so Adam could write down the numbers of the pictures that spoke out to him.

He ran the slideshow again, on a slower speed, giving Adam all the time he needed to write down a first selection. An hour or so later Adam had picked the final pictures for each of his bandmembers and dancers and Victor wrote down Adam’s instruction in his notebook, carefully writing down the message each picture had to have, the size and color of frame each picture had to have.

When they were all done, he took out a memory stick handing it over to Adam. “Here, take this. It contains each and every picture I took of you both tonight.” Seeing the surprised look in his eyes he went on. “He’s the friend you were talking about isn’t he? I may not know much Adam but I’m not a blind man. It’s written all over your faces, hell it’s written all over yours right now.”

Adam could feel his face blush even more. “Yes, he’s the one I was talking about. I….” He didn't have time to finish his sentence as Victor laid his hand on his.

"You don't need to tell me anything Adam. Enjoy and cherisch what you both have. Not many people ever get to have or find what you two obviously have." 

“I am Victor, I am so grateful for what we have as recent as it is, for what we finally have. I gave up hoping for it a long time ago.”

Adam felt Victor gently squeeze his hand as he went on. “And in the end Adam, that is all that matters.”

He had changed the subject of the conversation, wanting to respect Adam’s privacy when it came to Tommy. They ended up talking British culture, British customs and Adam nearly peed himself when Victor had started saying typical British expression’s making Adam guess what they meant. It was past 2 AM when he took his leave, both men hugging as they said their goodbyes.


	3. Chapter 3

Adam lay restless in bed that night, tossing and turning every few minutes. The words Jay had said to him just before he had hugged him goodbye kept going over and over in his mind as he was reliving the moment.

“Can I tell you something Adam?”

“Well yeah sure you can.”

“I don’t want to sound out of place or anything. I mean I’m just a teenager right, what do I know of life?”

Adam had taken his hand in his. “You know a whole lot about life Jay, don’t let any other fool tell you otherwise. I think it’s amazing the way you are handling yourself. You’re awesomely brave and strong. I have nothing but respect for you and I mean that.”

“No I’m not Adam… I’m not brave …”

He didn’t say anything back, holding on to Jay’s hand as he sensed he wasn’t done talking yet.

“If I was brave I would have told … I would have told someone I had feelings for them and now I can’t anymore… I would have told Helena… We met at the hospital two years ago, she and I were both there for chemo and to cut a long story short, she died three months ago and I never told her. I never told her I had fallen in love with her. I never… ” His voice broke as he spoke, tears started to roll down his face.

“I’m sorry to hear that Jay. I don’t know what to say that could make this better somehow.”

“Don’t ever wait to tell someone you love them. Tell them Adam, tell them every day you love them. Life is too short, too fragile not to tell someone you love them, that you’re in love with them. It is a chance I will never have.” Tears streamed down even more and Adam had to fight back the tears in his own eyes as he knew all too well what Jay was talking about. _Tommy… Baby…_

“Jay?”

“Yes?”

“I promise you to tell the man I’m in love with I love him. I will tell him tonight, I will him tomorrow, I will tell him every day of our time together.” Pulling Jay into a hug he whispered in his ear. “You tell Helena you love her, even now, even today. Where ever she is, where ever her spirit is, she will know and hear you.”

Adam felt Jay hugging him closer, tighter and returned the feeling. The wheelchair made it not all that comfortable but he couldn’t care less. This, this felt right.

Jay broke loose of the hug, looking into Adam’s eyes. “Thank you.”

“No Jay, thank you.”

Every time he closed his eyes trying to clear his mind and sleep it only intensified his feelings, intensifying what he already knew… He was alone, away from that body, away from that heart he had held close to his own the night before, away from Tommy.

As much as he had meant what he had said to him about having a great time with Isaac and Monte and their what-ever-the-hell-the-damn-name-was PSP game it had hurt him to let him go. Knowing he needed to be close to Tommy like they had been the night before.  He so wanted to repeat, to relive that what happened.

He had woken up to a sound close to his ear, although he couldn’t see anything he definitely could feel it: Tommy lying next or better said half on top of him, his face buried in his neck, his hand wrapped around his right shoulder as if he was trying to hold on to Adam, his leg curled around his waist. He had lain awake for some time, listening to the sleeping sounds Tommy was making; it sounded almost like he was humming in his sleep. It sounded so heavenly, so peacefully, so hypnotizing it had run several shivers down his spine. Although he had had many men in his bed – some he had liked some he had loved – he had never felt this warm, this complete, this whole before. He had slowly moved to get even closer to that body that was already covering his, needing to intensify that contact as t-shirts and boxers were preventing that skin on skin contact. Feeling the warmth of Tommy’s body even more, folding his arms around him, holding him closer he had fallen back to sleep.

He hadn’t realized that as his mind drifted off to the memory he had moved, holding the pillow on which Tommy had slept in his arms, tucked up against his chest. It wasn’t until he tried to kiss Tommy, kiss the pillow that it had become painfully clear once more. He was lying alone in his bed, alone with his thoughts. _I miss you baby, so damn much. Please… Please Sunshine, come to me._

Without thinking he searched for his phone on the nightstand, as the screen lit up as he unlocked it he looked at his phone as if he was looking right through it. Torn between mustering up the courage to text what he felt and his brain screaming at him to remember to take baby steps, to give him all the time it needed. _Oh for crying out loud Lambert snap out of it! What the hell is wrong with you? What’s wrong with me? Need to change my mind before I do something stupid._

Adam got out of bed, walking over to the kitchen to make himself a cup of chamomile tea before he would watch some DVD and hopefully fall asleep while doing so. On his way back to his bedroom he saw an I-Pod lying on the counter, his heart skipping a few beats as he recognized it.

“Sunshine…. Baby…” The words escaped his lips softly as he stared at the I-Pod, it just lay there, _staring_ at him, _begging_ to be picked up and he did. How could he not? Having something of Tommy close to him, comforting him, _being_ with him tonight was all he wanted, all he needed.

Putting his cup on the nightstand before crawling into bed, curling himself up in the covers before switching it on. Most of the artists on it he had never heard of before meeting Tommy. He couldn’t help but smile as he remembered that one night when Tommy had invited him over for a ‘the ultimate-musical-education-of-a-fucking-life-time event’. Tommy had made him listen to at least two songs of every album he owned. Explaining the message or the idea behind the songs, who played or had played in the band, reciting the history of the band, when he had started listening to that particular band or artist, how many time he saw that band play live. Hell he had even been teaching Adam how to headbang ‘like a man’ and boy did his head banged the next morning. He still wasn’t sure if that came from the booze or the actual headbanging, whatever it was, it was one of Adam’s favorites memories of him and Tommy.

Scrolling down the menu his eyes widened as he read the name of the playlist. ‘Adam’.  _He named a playlist after me?  How come I never saw this before?_ Adam couldn’t help but smile to that thought as he plugged in the earphones, holding Tommy’s pillow close to him before selecting it and closing his eyes.

How could he not recognize the song immediately? Flashbacks from two days ago filled his mind, grabbing him by the throat. It was to this song that Tommy had had his breakdown, his scream had cut right through his flesh and bones. His heart and chest physically hurts as he remembers the sight before him as he had rushed over to Tommy’s side. Whispering the lyrics as he remembers.

 

“ _I want somebody to share, share the rest of my life._ _  
Share my innermost thoughts, know my intimate details.  
She will listen to me when I want to speak.  
About the world we live in and life in general.  
  
Though my views may be wrong, they may even be perverted.  
She’ll hear me out, and won't easily be converted._ _  
To my way of thinking in fact she’ll often disagree.  
But at the end of it all she will understand me.   
_

_I want somebody who cares for me passionately.  
With every thought and with every breath.  
Someone who'll help me see things in a different light.  
All the things I detest I will almost like.”  
  
Oh God I can’t … _ He couldn’t continue listening to the song, not now anyway. Emotions still to raw, to fresh, to exposed to the surface he forwarded to the next one. He didn’t recognize it immediately only hearing the sound of a piano, simple chores and yet very intriguing.

_“I still recall the taste of your tears.  
Echoing your voice just like the ringing in my ears.   
My favorite dreams of you still wash ashore.   
Scraping through my head 'till I don't want to sleep anymore.   
  
You make this all go away.   
You make this all go away.   
I'm down to just one thing.   
And I'm starting to scare myself.   
You make this all go away.   
You make this all go away.   
I just want something.   
I just want something I can never have “_

Adam’s heart flinches as he hears the words and recognizes the song, ‘ _I just want something I can never have.’_ It hits him hard, this isn’t just any playlist. It’s a playlist of Adam, _about_ Adam, _for_ Adam. _Oh baby I’m so sorry… I was so blind, so damn stupid._ As he continues to listen to the song tears are starting to well up in his eyes. _  
  
You always were the one to show me how  
Back then I couldn't do the things that I can do now.   
This thing is slowly taking me apart.   
Grey would be the color if I had a heart.   
  
Come on tell me   
  
You’ll make this all go away.   
You’ll make this all go away.   
I'm down to just one thing.   
And I'm starting to scare myself.   
You’ll make this all go away.   
You’ll make this all go away.   
I just want something.   
I just want something I can never have  
  
In this place it seems like such a shame.   
Though it all looks different now,   
I know it's still the same   
Everywhere I look you're all I see.   
Just a fading fucking reminder of who I used to be.”_

Fighting back the tears in his eyes, holding on the Tommy’s pillow so tightly, breathing in the smell that is Tommy’s he reaches for his phone. He doesn’t care if it makes him look weak or soft or whatever. As the tears start to roll down he types a message:

 

_‘I miss you baby, so fucking much…’_

The next song isn’t an actual song, it’s just a guitar playing. He doesn’t recognize it either and looks down at the I-Pod to see who or what it is. As he looks down at the screen his heart definitely skips a few beats “To my love, to Adam – TJR”. Tears of joy, of love, of heartache for missing Tommy roll down his face. As he listens to the melody Tommy plays hearing him hum along on some parts more tears roll down his face and he starts typing a new message.

 

_‘I really hope you’re still up… Please come over Tommy… Please.’_


	4. Chapter 4

Meanwhile back in the bus the Playstation battle opposing Neil and Tommy to Isaac and Monte reaches a critical point. Neil and Tommy are close to pulverizing Isaac’s and Monte’s high score and are giving it their all shooting and fighting their way through the game.

“Die you fucker!"

”On your left man, watch out!”

“Yeah I see him, I see him! I got him!”

“Oh yes, you sleazy bastard! Take that up your ass!”

“Come on T, let’s finish this.”

“Right behind ya man.”

Monte and Isaac are watching them play in silence, eyes fixated on the plasma screen, realizing they’re about to get their ass kicked as Tommy and Neil shoot down one bad guy after another.

“Fuck yeah! We fucking made it!” Tommy yells out as he tosses the control up in the air.

Neill looks over to both men sitting on the couch a huge grin crosses his face. “Ha! Who’s the man now Monte?”  He high-fives Tommy before pulling him close for a very strange and oddly looking victory dance. As if they telepathically communicated both start singing as they jump and dance all over the bus.

“Bad boys, bad boys. Whatcha gonna do when they come for you…”

Laughter fills the bus as the four of them burst out into a full blown breathtaking laughter. Tears roll down their faces by the time they manage to pull themselves somewhat together. Isaac is the first to regain some form of self-control, grabbing his stomach cause damn it hurts from laughing too much, whipping away the tears.

“You guys are going to be the death of me! I so need a drink right now, you guys want a beer?”

They all nod and Isaac moves over to fridge pulling out four bottles. He’s about to open the first one when he hears a phone vibrate. Looking over to the counter he sees Tommy’s screen flash up, showing Adam’s face. The screen also reveals what time it is, it’s close to 4 AM. _What the hell is he still doing up this time of the night?_

“Yo Tommy, come and give me a hand with this man, can’t get this fucking bottle open.”

“Dude! Are you fucking kidding me?!? You really are a sorry excuse of a man you know that don’t you!” Shaking his head and throwing up his hands in the air in defeat in a way he’s seen Sutan or better said Raja do. It somehow seems fitting to imitate the degree of drama. “Hold on pops, I’m coming over. Hand over man and look closely how it’s done.”  

Isaac moves in closer, looking down at Tommy’s hands as he ever so slowly starts to open the bottle as if he was showing it to a 5-year old. When he’s close enough he whispers in his ear. “Check out your phone, Adam’s face just popped up on the screen.”

“Huh?”

“Your phone man, I just saw Adam’s face on it.”

Isaac feels Tommy looking over to his phone and starts an entire conversation with Tommy just by looking at him, urging him to pick up the damn phone and to move to the bathroom.

“Ah! Now I see… Oh well blame it on the booze I guess.”

He blinks an eye to Tommy as he picks up his phone making his way for the bathroom, unlocking it as he closes the door behind him, his screen revealing his has three new texts.

 

‘ _Cannot wait to hold you in my arms baby… xxx’  
‘I miss you baby, so fucking much…’  
‘I really hope you’re still up… Please come over Tommy… Please.’_

_  
_

He stares at his screen as he reads Adam’s last message. “Fuck! Fuck! FUCKING FUCK! Why the fuck did I agree to silencing our phones?” Getting to Adam was all he could think about as he wrote a text back.

‘ _You still awake?’_

_Please, please, please be awake baby._

Adam had fallen asleep sometime after sending the last text to Tommy. Actually he had cried himself to sleep. The buzzing of his phone woke him up almost immediately.

“Tommy?” 

He quickly realized it was his phone and not Tommy actually walking in his room. His hands moved over to his phone, picking it up to read the message hoping whole heartedly the text came from Tommy.  A smile appeared on his lips as he read the three words of the text before sending a reply.

‘ _Hi there…’_

_‘Did I wake you?’_

_‘You did but I don’t mind at all!’_

_'We all put our phones in silence mode.... Fucking wish I hadn't had agreed....'_

_'Don't be baby. How’s the game?'  
_

_‘We just finished … Kicked their ass by the way!’_

_‘So congratulations are in order?’_

_‘Yep! That and a fucking medal!’_

It was small talk, both of them knew it, both of them ready to play along until the time was right to address that what had made Adam send his texts in the first place. Tommy‘s instinct knew, they knew he had to make the first step. They’ve been close friends long enough before they became _them_ so he did what came natural to him, making that first step, reaching out to Adam.

_‘Missed you too baby… xox’_

_‘Didn’t want to pull you away from your game acting like a selfish prick.’_

_‘You’re not! Besides, we just finished.’_

_‘Still…’_

_‘Baby stop beating around the bush, talk to me…’_

He flushed the toilet before stepping out of the bathroom, determinate to get to Adam as soon as he could and that, that would be within the next five minutes.

 

"FUCKING FUCK!" Monte and Neil turned to Isaac as they heard Tommy curse out loud, questions visible in their eyes.

"Don't look at me! I'm sitting here. How the fuck should I know?"

"Don't play dumb man, you know something." Neil sneered at Isaac.

"Again. I'm sitting here. He, he's in there." _Shit of course I know something, I know all too well._

He tried changing the conversation as Tommy came out of the bathroom, phone is his hand clearly texting to someone and a blush on his cheeks.

"You alright man?" Monte's voice was calm, it was asked with genuine concern, not a 'spill-the-beans' tone.

"Euh... Yeah... Yeah, why shouldn't I be?" He couldn't hide it in his voice nor in the look in his eyes, something was clearly on his mind. Before he could say anything more his phone buzzed again. He opened the text message.

_‘Me meeting Jay, it was hard baby. I can't stop thinking about it.’_

_‘Jay?’_  Tommy had a pretty good idea who he was talking about as he replied to Adam still he wasn’t sure they were on the same page here.

_‘The Make-A-Wish kid. The meet and greet, It was hard baby, the kid is terminally ill... I just can't shake it of me... '_

Sadness appeared on his face while he was reading it thinking about what he should answer. Neil’s voice however drew him back to reality.

"Come on Tommy, spill it."

"There's nothing to spill Neil, I'm just tired that's all. I'm gonna crash at Adam's. You guys can have a rematch or something."

"Crash at Adam's?!? Of course you are man, what does he need this time?" Neil's didn't mean anything by it. They were all used of Adam and Tommy spending the night together from time to time. The very poor attempt at lightening the atmosphere failed miserably.

Tommy turned to him, giving him the finger, fire raging in his eyes. "Fuck you Neil!"

The door slammed shut behind him leaving the three men looking at each other with a puzzled look. Isaac sighed deeply making both Neil and Monte look at him.

"Stop looking at me like that you two! I don't know what just happened here and even if I knew I wouldn't say. He's one of my closest friends, you can't expect or ask me that."

Neil didn’t let go “Don’t tell me you buy that shit? He was doing fine until Adam came into the picture! Tired my ass, I mean what the fuck!”

“No one is asking that you betray him Isaac. Chill out will ya, both of you! Adam and or Tommy will tell us in due time when he or they want to share.  And Neil, this isn’t some Goddamn conspiracy theory give them both a break.”

Neither Isaac nor Neil said anything, Monte had kids and his big-daddy’s voice was loud and clear. It screamed _don’t make me say that again._

 

The door was barely slammed shut as he started running over to Adam’s trailer; he wanted and needed to be there, be close to the man he loved more than anything. He didn’t do well around people who were hurting, especially if they had a special place in his heart.

Opening the trailer door, he walked straight to Adam’s bedroom. He put down his phone on the night stand on Adam's side, kicked off his shoes and let his jacked fall on the ground. Tommy could tell Adam had been crying, his eyes still had that reddish color as he looked into them. He didn't say anything as he crawled onto the bed, making his way to Adam who hadn’t moved, still curled up on his side, a pillow tucked against his chest. He spooned himself around Adam, making sure there was little to no vacant place between them anymore. The soft touch of his arm on Adam’s was all it took before he rolled over burying himself in Tommy’s arms.

They lay in silence for a while. Tommy knew Adam would start talking when he was ready, when he had calmed down a bit.

“Can you imagine what it must be like? Being 17 and having to face the fact that you only have 6 months – at best – to live. I wouldn’t even know what to do and I’m 12 years older."

Tommy didn’t say anything; all he did was tightening his arms around Adam waiting for him to continue.

“You should have seen him baby, he’s so brave, so full of life and joy. Grateful and thankful for every single moment he has left even when…. When he has lost the love of his life…”

Adam’s voice broke, clinging on to Tommy even more. He could feel Adam’s tears soaking through his t-shirt.

“Tell me baby, we’ve got all night.”

“I love you. You know that right? Cause I do, I love you so much baby I don’t know what I do if I lost you, if you would came to die.”

Pulling back a bit he gently pushed his finger under Adam’s chin so their eyes would meet. He didn’t say anything letting his eyes speak for him.

“He made me promise. I promised him… That I would tell you every day I loved you, that I’m head over heels in love with you. He lost his love you know. She died 3 months ago at the hospital and he never told her and now he will never ever get to tell someone he’s in love with them…” Adam had let go of Tommy, sitting himself between Tommy’s legs becoming more and more agitated and upset as he went on.

“I, I mean we, we came close to that baby… We almost lost each other and I … I can’t take that… I can’t even begin to imagine what it would be like. All I fucking know right now is that in 2 weeks the tour will end and we … We won’t be together anymore… I mean every day that is. I’ll go to my place and you to yours and I can’t… I just can’t… My mind is running back and forth, jumping from one thing to another. I can’t make it stop! I can’t make my brain stop!” He started sobbing, clearly over emotional, melancholic and stuck in a twisted nostalgic mood.

Tommy didn’t know what to say. He’d been thinking about it himself and it freaked the hell out of him. When he looked at Adam his eyes caught something, a bulge clearly visible in Adam’s leopard sweatpants. Without thinking he took Adam’s hands in his, pulling him closer to him and eventually on top of him. He may not know what to say, but he knew what could, what would help Adam calm down. It was something that worked for him, something that had always make him found some form of inner peace again…

_An orgasm._


	5. Chapter 5

A gentle kiss, nothing more than lips brushing against lips, a signal to get Adam’s attention.

“Baby… Let go, just let go.”

“I can’t. I’m just not in the mood sweetie.”

Adam backed away from Tommy, eventually getting off the bed before pacing up and down his bedroom. It wasn’t exactly a master suite so it was more like pacing around in circles, partly drowned in his thoughts partly venting away.

“Did I fuck up? I did, didn’t I? Don’t say it, just don’t… I know I did. I should have told you… How the fuck am I gonna make it through? … I can’t deal with all this shit right now…” His voice grew more and more agitated, anger was rising in his body. He could feel it, that almost palpable itch very much present under his skin.

He hadn’t moved, hadn’t said anything ever since Adam broke away. He watched him pace around the room, listened as the words left his lips not always fully understanding what Adam was talking about, sometimes he spoke out loud, sometimes he merely whispered to himself. He waited patiently till it would erupt, until Adam would surrender to the emotions, the thoughts and the insecurity’s he had held bottled up. Tommy knew all too well that even if he was an open book, some stuff weren’t meant to be shared in public. Some stuff were private, his and his alone and like any other human being sometime his brain high wired under it all and just went ‘BOUM’.

Tommy had always compared this side of Adam to a volcano on the verge of an eruption, starting with light tremors building up to mild earthquakes filling the air with roars coming from deep down underground, a dangerous promise of what is yet to come. Eventually the sky would be filled with gas and ashes and debris before it finally erupts thrusting out a mixture of steam, ash, volcanic bombs and blocks and loads and loads of all-consuming lava.

He had never understood why or how or whatever the physical reason behind it was. The fact remained that just like Adam was right now he too was often ‘blessed’ with a painful hard-on when he was this lost in a negative thinking process. It was as if his body was telling him something, showing him the way back down and back into the light. Jerking off wasn’t a sexual thing than, in fact it was anything but sexual, it was a tool if you want, a way to cool back down. A way for his thoughts and brain to reconnect with each other, a physical way of synchronization.

“Make it stop! Shot it down! I need it to stop Tommy! I can’t fucking breathe like this!”

_That’s it baby, let it out, all of it. You need to do this on your own, come on baby, you can do it. I know you can._

He climbed out of bed moving into Adam, invading his space.

“Adam.” Tommy’s voice was firm yet gentle at the same time. When Adam didn’t react he spoke again laying both hands on his shoulders. “Adam!”

“What?” It was whispered so softly Tommy could barely hear it.

He didn’t say anything, he just looked – stared actually - down at Adam’s crotch before he could eventually feel a forehead pressed against his.

“I can’t baby.”

“This isn’t about me or us and you fucking know it, fuck this isn’t even sexual for fuck sake! This is about you and your way of grounding yourself. It’s what helps us and in this fucking case _you_ relax and breathe again. So get that dick out and do what you got to do! ”

He wasn’t pissed but he was clearly getting there. Tommy had taken Adam's hands in his, guiding him over to the bed before gently but firmly pushing him onto it.

“I’ll be out….” His words cut off when Adam placed a finger on his lips.

“Stay. I want you to stay … I need you to stay.” A whisper, a plea, a cry out for something.

There was no need for words, only nodding his head to put the message out. Without speaking Adam pulled him onto the bed, shoving and pushing at him until he laid in the middle of the bed their eyes locked onto each other. Feeling the warmth and pressure of one of Adam’s hands on his left hip he turned his head a bit to face Adam fully.

“Can I?”

Two simple short words with a u huge meaning behind, he understood perfectly what they meant.

“Yes.”

That was all it took. Adam closed his eyes as he blindly moved himself over and on top of Tommy, pressing his hardness into his hipbone. His face tensed, frowned as he started grinding up against Tommy, slow and hard to begin with, obviously torn between letting go and overcoming some form of shame. Adam was biting his lower lip, breathing heavily through his nose fighting to hold back any moan or sound that could escape his lips moving harder and faster, without apologies, using him as one would use a tool and Tommy knew it was just under that ‘aw-to-hard’ feeling, it always worked for him that way. The closer Adam came to his release the more his face tensed, pain written all over it and then it was gone, a minute or so was all it took, a moan of pain escaped Adam’s throat as his orgasm hits and Tommy could feel him tremble all over.

Adam didn’t take time to catch his breath rolling off of Tommy as fast as he could before curling up on his side. Tommy could hear the crackles of a plastic wrapping silently smiling to himself as he recognized the smell of Adam’s apple scented baby wipes. He could hear the fumble of a sweatpants being pulled down and the sound of a wipe wiping off the cum in his pants or boxers. When all evidence was sufficiently removed he moved to toss the wipes in the bin before taking back his position on the bed. Feeling Tommy sliding over, spooning him, folding his arm protectively over his chest he relaxed both mentally as physically. Welcoming the heat, the comfort washing over his body and mind like a blooming valley warming up under the morning sun.

"Thank you."

“Anytime baby, anytime.”

They lay in silence for a while enjoying each other’s warmth when Adam started yawning.

“When do you need to get up?"

"Alarm’s set at 8:15"

"Get some sleep baby boy, you don’t do well with little sleep." Pulling Adam closer is his lap, kissing his shoulders and upper back through his t-hirt. "Wake me up before you go?"

“You're not a morning person." Adam’s voice couldn’t have been more filled with love as he spoke.

"Don't care!” He pouted. “Wanna kiss you before you leave for your appointments."

"I promise Sunshine, I'll come kiss you before I leave."

“Pinky promise?”

“Pinky promise baby.”

Adam grabbed Tommy's arm that was covering his chest, lacing their fingers together. Being the little spoon wasn’t something that happened a lot yet with Tommy it always came naturally whenever he needed it, no questions asked, just two people giving and taking what they could. Embracing the moment he allowed himself to drift into the dark as sleep took over, Tommy following right behind him.

 

When the sound of the alarm woke them both up they were still lying in the exact same position as when they fell asleep.

“Mmmmm … 5 more minutes ….”

Tommy’s sleep filled voice sounded so adorable, so husky Adam pushed himself closer to him before snoozing his alarm.

“I can give you 8 minutes baby.”

“Mmmm … No talking ….”

 Adam couldn't help but chuckle, they’ve shared rooms and beds before. He knew he would fall back to sleep in the blink of an eye and for sure there it was; Tommy’s soft snoring. He searched for his phone shutting off this alarm before slowly moving away from Tommy and getting out of bed.

He hadn't noticed, didn't feel Adam slip out of bed. Hadn’t heard the shower run or the sound of Adam blow drying his hair. It wasn’t until he felt lips on his, a soft touch on his face he started opening his eyes.

“Hmmm … Too early … Sleep.”

Gently leaning forward he touched Tommy’s lips. “Sleep tight Sunshine.”

Opening his eyes a bit more he looked into clear blue eyes. “Noooo..” He whined. “One more, need more kisses.”

“How can I say no to that?” A smile audible is his voice before brushing his hair, kissing his lips again and again, softly almost chastely.

“Text me?”

“You know I will sleepyhead.”

Adam stood up from the bed and watched as Tommy pulled his pillow closer to him before falling back to sleep.

_I love you Sunshine, so much.  
_

 

The meeting at the record company had gone well, they talked about figures and statistics and profit. _What else?_ Adam had honestly wondered why the hell they had wanted him there, he barely said anything cause well he didn’t have anything to add. They were on their way to have brunch at when his phone buzzed.

“Am awake… Miss you already.”

“Hi sleepyhead, miss you too.”

“Still in meeting?”

“Just finished, about to have brunch here.”

“Go to the bathroom and call me!”

“???”

“Don’t ??? me, call me!”

“Gentlemen, will you excuse me for one moment, I will be right back.”

He quickly scanned the restaurant before heading over the men’s room and calling Tommy. When the call was picked up all he could hear was the sound of someone moaning.

“Tommy?”


	6. Chapter 6

20 minutes or so earlier Tommy had woken up and like any other healthy young man waking up with morning wood wasn't an unusual or shocking event. He was still fully clothed as both he and Adam had fallen asleep with their clothes on in the early hours of the night. Stretching and enjoying the place in Adam's bed he lazily scratched his belly before removing his jeans and boxers fully intended to enjoy the privacy of Adam's bedroom to the fullest and in doing so having some long and slow quality time with himself. Living on top of each other on tour and having the time to practice the art of self-love didn't go well together so no way he was going to turn down the opportunity.

It wasn't long after that that Tommy was lost in his moment his favorite movie playing in his head. Even though he never had done anything with a man before, the fantasy of topping Adam had been with him for months; having him moaning and begging for more underneath him. He had always loved watching his cock slide in and out of his woman and the picture, the idea of rocking in and out of Adam was something that made him blind with want adding to that the sound Adam made when he came, a sound he had heard for real a few days ago, it made him loose so many inhibitions it eventually over won his shyness of inexperience.

Finding his phone he texted Adam trying not to get his hopes up to high, being in a meeting there was no guaranty he would be able to reply.

_‘Am awake… Miss you already’_

A smile appeared on Tommy’s lips when his phone buzzed almost immediately after he had send his message.

_‘Hi sleepyhead, miss you too.’_

_‘Still in meeting?’_

_‘Just finished, about to have brunch here.’_

With a devilish and evil grin on his face and a _Oh thank fuck for that_ thought he answered Adam.

_‘Go to the bathroom and call me!’_

_‘???’_

Tommy sighed heavily talking out loud as he replied. “Oh come on Adam don’t fuck with my mind like that! Damn you!”

 _‘Don't ??? me! Call me!’_  Gently stroking his hardness, waiting for a reply or a reaction from Adam. _Fuck, come call already before I chicken out._

And oh yeah, there was Adam's ringtone. Fumbling with his phone to pick up the call before letting it drop.

"Tommy?"  A hint of concern audible in his voice.

So much for trying to act all casual, the only thing that came out of Tommy’s mouth was a deep moan and another and another.

"Adam ... Ooooooh ..."

"Baby?"

"Hmmmm ... Sssht! ... Just ... Hmmmm ... Don't speak..." Tommy's voice already husky, broken filled with need.

Adam went from flaccid to hard in no time, already feeling pre-come sipping in his briefs, cupping his crotch through his jeans.

"Are you?" He was thinking it, hell he wanted to scream it out but decided not to unsure on how Tommy would react if he thought Adam was thinking he was jerking off.

"Yeah ... I'm ... Oh fuck!! So good ... Hmmmm ... I ... I ... Oh God..."

Adam was thanking every God he could think of that the handicapped toilet was at the far end of the others giving him some form of privacy as he loosened his belt shoving everything down to his knees before leaning against the wall taking his bud into his hand. Hearing Tommy moans were literally driving him nuts with want and lust and need.

"Adam ... Hmmmm .... Aaaah ... Make ... Make me come ... I ... I wanna... "

"Tell me... What do you want.... Oooh … Baby ... What do you need?"

"Make me come ... Want ... Hmmmm... Need to ... "His breath stopped, literary feeling his heartbeat in his throat. "Oh fuck babe... I... Aah... Hmmm ... I need to hear you come! Please ... Just please... "

Adam’s heart was racing so fast, pounding in his chest. He was sure Tommy would be able to hear it through the phone.

"Fuck... Oh baby you have no idea how bad I want you... The things I wanna do with you...  So bad... Hmmmm...  So hard for you baby... So fucking hard... Put me on speaker... Please..."

Adam couldn't remember the last time he was leaking so much providing him with more than enough lubrication as he started stroking harder and harder. _I'm so turning into a fucking teenager again._

"Baby... Look under the bed... There's ... Ooooh ... Green bag ... Lube ... Hmmmm.... Red bottle... Used it... Plenty…"

Without thinking Tommy put Adam on speaker. Slowly stroking his hardness  as he moved onto the bed, quickly looking underneath it to find the bag and the lube.

"Got it."

"Use it, it'll feel so good baby."

As he waited for Tommy to do what he had asked he bit his lower lip in an attempt to hold back the moans, his hips had started rocking back and forth as if they had a mind, a will of their own and is doing so he was fucking into his own hand.

Doing what Adam had asked he generously poured the lube into his hand frowning as he recognized the smell.

"Chocolate scented lube? You've gotta be fucking kidding me right?" Tommy shook his head thinking how only Adam could have such a thing.

"And flavored! Hmmmm... You have no idea baby."

He had to admit it, it felled good, really fucking good. It felt like any other lube in his hand yet down there it felt warm, like the moist of a woman's pussy.

"Ooooh... Fuck... This ... Hmmmm ... So good ... Listen..."

Picking up his phone from the bed he held it close to his cock as he kept stroking, building up the pace, losing himself in the pleasure and the sound coming from the lube.

"Ooooooh ... Hmmmm  … Oh God! ... "  Adam almost lost it right there and then. The hunger, the lust he felt for Tommy burning through his skin. Hearing the unmistakable sounds of Tommy jacking off he couldn't help but look down his own hardness, all big, hard and shiny with pre-come. _Lots of pre-come._

"Adam ... I want... Oooh ... I ... "

"Tell me baby ... Tell me ..."

"Something ... Hmmmm ... Anything ... Please ... Just ... Aaaahhhh..."

They both had experience with phone sex, hell Tommy loved it and he sure as hell knew how and what to say with a girl. This however was with a man, with Adam and having no actual experience on any level with a man he was on unfamiliar ground.

"Oh baby ... Hmmmm ... Wanna taste you so bad ... Lick you all over ... Blow you as I look in your eyes, your hand guiding me down..."

"Yes! Oooh God ... Mmmmmmm please yesssss ..."

Somehow they stopped talking, both so lost in the pleasure of hearing the other moan, whispers the only 'words' that came out were 'Hmmmm ... So good ... Baby  ... Ooooh ... God ... Fuck  ...'

"Oooh ... Hmmmm ... Cl … Close." Tommy's breathing became more and more difficult, his moans louder and louder, his orgasm closing in on him with each stroke.

"Don't ... Not yet baby ... Ooooh ... Wait ... Wait for me..." Adam started building up the pace even more. No matter what he wanted to come with Tommy.

"Adam ... I ... Ooooooh ... Can't ..."

"Don't hold back baby ... Hmmmm ... Come baby... Come with me… So hard baby... For you ... All for you … Aaaahhhh."

As Tommy's orgasm hits, his moans turn into some wild predatory sounds before chanting Adam's name over and over again each time louder and louder pushing him over the edge.

He came so hard Adam had to brace himself against the bathroom door, he literally was seeing stars in broad daylight, his knees barely able to hold him up panting heavily as he tried to catch his breath.

"Tommy ... That was so ..."  Wrecked, totally and utterly wrecked. There was no other way to describe Adam’s voice at the moment.

"Yeah... I know." Tommy's voice was a wretched as his own. "Thank you."

"Oh baby you don't have to thank me I enjoyed this as much as you. Fuck you have no idea how much. Wish I was there though. Wanna smother you with kisses and cuddle."

"Yeah me too baby."

Adam could hear the sound of the baby wipes being pulled out and started cleaning himself up, flushing down the toilet paper and washing his hands.

"Sushine?"

"Honey?"

"As much as I don't want to do this I have to get back."

"Yeah I know."

"We're so doing this again though!"

"Liked it?" Tommy mentally kicked himself for sounding so weak, he hadn't meant to sound so insecure when the words escaped his lips, hoping Adam wouldn't have picked it up.

"Liked it?! Baby I fucking loved it! Promise me we'll do that again... Soon." Emphasizing the soon cause damn Adam was so far up cloud Number Nine he was already making plans for the next trip.

Off course he had picked up the insecurity in Tommy's voice and to be honest he was so proud of him, he knew how hard, how shy Tommy was about the whole gay thing. Not that Tommy was shy per se, they've never been shy around each other before but back then they were friends, close friends with a certain entertainment level added to it. Now however they were on the way of becoming a whole lot more and he was willing to do everything he could to reassure Tommy, make him comfortable with every aspect of their relation. Adam knew that having phonesex didn't necessary meant he would get to put his hands down Tommy pants yet.

"I really really really liked it baby and dear God you sound so fucking unbelievable when you come! I wouldn't mind hearing that every hour of every day."

"The fuck?!? You trying to kill me here? Am not some fucking Duracell bunny on speed you know! Fucking pervert!" A smile plastered on his face, a warm glow around his heart, a weight or was it shyness lifted from his shoulders as he realized Adam had enjoyed it just as much as he had.

"You better consider drawing up your will old man! I have every intention of shortening your life expectations; these massive orgasms are dangerous for a fragile old heart you know." Adam's laughter filled the men's room as he pulled his briefs and pants back up, checking himself in the mirror before stepping out of the stall.

Tommy had heard the sound of the lock being opened. He knew Adam had to get back to his brunch, he had already kept him busy long enough.

"Go and enjoy your brush honeybun. I'm gonna grab a shower and start packing to check in the hotel. You've got your stuff packed?"

"Yeah, packed the last few things this morning. Check in for me?"

"You know I will baby. I'll text ya when I've arrived at the hotel."

"Ok thanks babe, I really should be going back."

"I know... Just don't wanna hang up you know."

"Yeah.. I know what you mean sunshine. Love you baby."

"Love you more honeybun."

Adam blew a kiss into the phone before hanging up. Taking a deep breath before stepping out of the men's room and heading back to the table he had left almost fifteen minutes ago.

"I'm sorry gentlemen to have kept you waiting. I had to take this call."

"Is everything alright Adam?" One of the executives asked.

Discretely cupping his groin under the table, a huge smile appearing on his face and the feeling of a blush coloring his cheeks Adam answered truthfully.  "Couldn't be better thank you."


	7. Chapter 7

Meanwhile Tommy was still in Adam’s bed enjoying both his afterglow and the warmth from the bed as his mind drifted back to the moment he had just shared with Adam. He couldn’t believe they just had phone sex. One thing was for sure he thought to himself: ‘ _We're so going to do that again._ ’

When he finally got out of bed some half hour later, natures call had actually forced him to get up, he couldn’t believe his eyes as he looked at the bathroom mirror. With a wide grin on his face, his heart filled with love and warmth and shaking his head fondly he looked at the huge red heart that had been drawn on it and the kiss that had been pressed next to it. “Oh Adam, you big romantic teddy bear! What the hell am I going to do with you?” 

He couldn’t take his eyes of it though as he took a leak, a little idea already forming in his mind. He quickly washed his hands before going through Adam’s make-up bag and pulling out a cherry lip gloss. “Two can play this game baby,” he said to himself as he applied it on his lips and leaned on his toes to press his own kiss next to Adam’s and adding ‘U2’ next to his lips. Taking a step back he couldn’t help but smile at the mirror. He went for his phone, took a picture of the mirror and sends it over with a little text.

‘ _You’re such a fucking romantic dork you know that!?! And honestly baby, I fucking love it!!! xxx’_

Adam had just finished his plate when his phone buzzed. A smile already curled onto his lips when he saw the message came from Tommy, as the picture and text unfolded itself on the screen he couldn’t hold back the chuckle before replying. There was no denying it, he had always loved Tommy’s humor and now he loved it even more.

_‘And you mister, you are so totes adorkable! xox’_

He kept his phone in his lap knowing all too well a reply would come soon and yes, there it was, he felt the buzz.

_‘Adorkable?? Fuck yeah! That’s my new middle name, didn’t you know?’_

“Oh baby, what am I going to do with you?” He hadn’t meant for it to come out loud but then again he couldn’t care less. He replied and tucked his phone away.

_‘I do now sunshine, I do now.’_

Adam went on with his brunch while Tommy carried on with his order of business: taking a shower and getting dressed before packing up his things and Adam’s before they all left the venue together and checked in to the hotel. It hadn’t been the first time he or Monte or Lane would take care of Adam’s stuff while he was already off to a meeting or an interview or photo shoot somewhere. It had made perfect sense to both Monte and himself to step in and take care of it. Lane took take of making sure the bags were sent to where ever they needed to be send and they took care of making sure everything that was needed to be send was packed and secured. It was a perfect example of a team effort.

He was making a quick double check around Adam’s trailer before heading over to the bus, he still needed to pack his own things as he got a text from Isaac.

_‘You ready dude? We’re all packed and ready to go and being in a good mood I took the liberty of packing your stuff.’_

_‘Wow!?! You packed my stuff? Even my smelly socks?’_

_‘You call those things socks? Dude, they fucking smell worse than some old Rochefort!’_

_‘Haha very funny man! I’ll be right over, I’m finishing up with Adam’s things. Be there in 10.’_

_‘Ok, see ya.’_

He finishes the tour of Adam’s trailer, closing and grabbing his backpack and heads out. He’s just about to walk around it when he literally walks into Jacob and is taken aback by the impact.

“Wow! Watch it!”

“Aw! Sorry man, my bad. Didn’t see you.”

Jacobs rubs his shoulder while Tommy rubs his head praying he won’t get a lump on his head. They both look at each other before Jacob starts laughing. “You sure as hell are a thick-skulled man!”

“Says the man with a hidden alloy running through his bones!” There’s no anger in Tommy’s voice, if anything he’s trying to hold back the laugh that is trying to get out.

Both men eventually start laughing out loud before Jacob asks is he really is ok. “Yeah I’ll live don’t worry about it. How’s the shoulder?”

“Totally busted, looks like I won’t be able to use my arm anymore.”

Without thinking Tommy answers; “Thank God for that, would have felt pretty bad if you wouldn’t have had some permanent damage after this. A man’s ego needs to be stroked now and then you know”

“Well consider it stroked, you did a fine job at messing me up,” as he gestures to Tommy to follow him Jacob carries on. “Come on Mister Ego Tripper, let’s walk a bit, I want to tell you something”

Tommy stops walking and looks at Jacob with a confused look on his face, he really has got no idea what he wants to talk about, it’s not like they’ve spend much time together.

 “Will you stop looking at me like that young man, I’m not going to eat you alive for crying out loud,” Jacobs tell him and his voice sounds warm and genuine and it puts Tommy at ease.

“Ok, shoot. I’m listening.”

Jacob turns a bit more to Tommy so he can look at him straight as he begins. “Look lad, what you do with what I’m about to tell you is your business not mine. I don’t know what is going on between you and Adam and it I don’t need to know but I do know the man cares for you much more than you know. Don’t mess with him and for fuck sake take care of yourself will you! Drinking yourself into oblivion doesn’t help.”

He’s about to answer Jacob to mind his Goddamn business when Jacobs puts up his hand indicating his not finished.

“We’ve seen a lot of stars here, some are real assholes, some have lost touch with reality and some like Adam are the real deal, warm and genuine and they get under your skin, in a good way. You didn’t see the look on his face or hear the worry in his voice when you were MIA. Even a blind man could and would have agreed with me, the man loves you dearly. Don’t fuck with him, he doesn’t deserve it.”

There’s no animosity, no accusation, no impending guilt trip in Jacob’s voice. It's a statement of facts, pure and simple, and Goddamn effective and Tommy keeps on looking at him with a an expression that’s somewhere between a baffled and surprised kind of look on his face. He keeps on looking at Jacob for a good minute or so before he’s found the ability to speak again.

“If I wouldn’t have drunk myself into oblivion I wouldn’t have… Adam wouldn’t have or like whatever… It wouldn’t have been able to get out… I care for him too you know, so fucking much.” A blush might be coloring his cheeks he looked straight and dauntless into Jacob’s eyes. “I would never ever hurt Adam. I… I too care for him dearly.”

“Think that became pretty clear last night at the show when you kissed him and it’s good to know you feel the same about each other. If you don’t mind me saying it, you guys look good together.”

Tommy’s cheeks turned bright red under Jacob’s compliment. “Thanks.”

“Now come on, let’s get you boys and girls ready to leave for the hotel or that little woman kicks my ass.”

“Yeah, Lane would you know, kick your ass. We’ve seen her do it before.”

They walk in silence over to the busses and find everyone already outside. They all great each other and engage in small talk while their luggage are already being loaded into 2 small vans. When everything is loaded, the vans leave and set course to the hotel. The girls and Sutan along with Terrance get into the first car which leaves the second car for Isaac, Monte, Taylor, Lane and Tommy.

As everybody gets in Tommy walks back over to Jacob. “Dude, euh… If I were to take someone, let say out on a date here, where could I go to? It needs to be private, don’t need some fan dropping in or something.”

“You have something to write down? There a two places where we have sent many celebrities to, they’re both small places, good food and stuff where you can enjoy a time in private and away from the world, just you and your date. When you call to make the reservation, make sure you mention you’ve been send by Big Daddy. They’ll know I’ve sent you there.”

Jacob dictates the 2 numbers to Tommy as he puts them down in a text in his phone. After saving the text in his drafts and putting away is phone he and Jacob say their goodbye’s and shake hands.

The father figure in Jacobs takes over for a second as he pulls Tommy into a hug before whispering into his ear, “Take care of Adam and yourself and be happy together lad.”

Tommy can’t help but hug Jacob back. “Thanks man and I will, we will.”

Adam was already on route and close to his second interview at a local radio station when his phone buzzed.

‘W _e’ve all checked in, you’re in room 407 and so is your luggage. I’m so stealing that hot tub of yours right now, it’s a fucking king-size whirlpool! Lane is on route to you as we speak. She has your key, spare is at @ reception as usual.’_

He reads the text and then reads it again and again, his eyes only seemed to see the words ‘ _hot tub’._ The thought of a very naked Tommy in his hotel bathroom sure as hell is doing things to him.

_‘Thanks baby, what room are you in?’_

_‘We’re all on 3th floor, Isaac and me are just under you_ _:)_ _, we have room 307.’_

_‘Under me? Yeah! Now that, I definitely like!’_

_‘Pervert!’_

_‘Don’t give me that old man, you fucking love it!’_

_‘Says who?’_

_‘Says me, now hush and get those old bones of yours in my fucking king-size bubble bath!’_

_‘Yours?? Yours my ass babe! It’s hotel property! You cannot break it out and take it with you.’_

Adam couldn’t help himself; he burst out into laughter phone clutched tightly in his hand. He was mentally imagining Tommy saying the words, hands on his hips, rolling his eyes and taking on that drama queen accent he had taken over from Sutan. With a huge smile still on his lips he answered Tommy.

_‘Will you just get those old bones in that tub and be sure to send me pics! Lots of them!’_

_‘See!! You’re a Goddamn pervert.’_

_‘Hey, who’s the old man here and who’s teasing a poor and innocent young man? I’ll be needing therapy you know.’_

_‘The shit that comes out of your mouth is amazing! Tell you what you poor innocent young man, I’ll take you myself to therapy! Happy now?’_

_‘Very! Will you be there to hold my hand? I’m kinda scared of doctors…’  
‘Gotta go sunshine, arrived at the interview _ _:(_ _‘_

_‘You know I will baby, always.’_

_‘Love you old man!’_

_‘Love you too little one. Text me when you’re done? xxx’_

_‘I will xox’_


	8. Chapter 8

The water almost filled up to his neck, the scent of the lavender bath oil filling the room, 3 candlelights strategically placed around the bath tub and a drink close at hand Tommy was more than enjoying the luxury and relaxation of the whirlpool. He loves this quality time with and for himself, time tends to come to a stop every time. They aren't any worries, no doomsday scenarios, no thoughts running through his mind. There's nothing but peace and quiet, a silent heaven in which he can recharge his batteries. He feels his muscles relaxing, feels how the jets hit his skin and lets himself submerge in the bliss that is his right now. At some point he opens his eyes and stares at the reflection of the dancing flames on the wall before him and it hits him, his mind starts putting puzzle pieces together and a smile appears on his lips as he sees the final image before him.

After he got out of the tub wrapped in a fluffy grey bathrobe he heads over the phone next to bed and calls reception who suggests he calls housekeeping about his demands. After hanging up with the man from housekeeping he looks around Adam's hotel room, picturing how the room will look like when it's all 're-done' and specially the look on Adam's face. Feeling pretty pleased with himself he looks at his reflection in the mirror and ends up having a conversation with his mirror image. "Two can play that game honeybun, hell I can play this game. You watch baby, this boy will swipe you off your feet in a heartbeat.”

He calls room service and places his order, giving up his room number for the bill and Adam's room for the delivery. Housekeeping told him they would bring everything up within the next hour and room service basically told him the same thing.

Without thinking twice he walks over the bed, grabs his phone and sends a message to Adam.

  _‘Thinking about you… Miss you… xxx’  
_

Adam had felt it shortly after they had arrived in the interview room, a draft blowing straight at him. He had looked around trying to see if there was a door or window open that could explain it but saw nothing.

“Adam?”

“I feel a draft and it’s hitting me straight at the back of my head.”

“You too huh, I thought I was imagining it.” Lane stated, “Want me to go look for another conference room?”

“Naah, I’ll be fine. It’s not like we’re going to be here for hours at the time are we.”

“You’re the boss Adam.” Lane went back to her seat in the far left corner of the room and continued whatever she was working on.

It was somewhat halfway through the interview when Adam started to feel it, that nagging feeling in the back of his head. He reached over to his scarf and pulled it around his neck asking the interviewer if it was possible to switch of the air-conditioning in the room.

Unfortunately for Adam it was too late by then, the nagging feeling is his head quickly transformed into a massive headache only to evolve into a full blow excruciating migraine. By the time the interview was over Adam’s head was pounding like crazy, the expression on his face had changed and Lane was no fool, she had already noticed the change in Adam’s body language.

When they got back into the car Adam could barely move his head anymore without wincing in pain at the slightest movement.

“I don’t suppose you have your pain meds on you?”

He was about to tell Lane he didn’t have them on you when he got a text from Tommy.

_'Practically speaking, do we wait for you at the hotel or are you joining us there?'_

They had made plans to all go out and have a bowling battle later on, band versus dancers. The winners would win a 'personal go for' during an entire week. Needless to say both teams were looking forward to kicking the other team's ass. The go for tasks had been carefully and devilishly debated and planned by, he was sure of it, both teams.

He too had looked forward to this evening albeit for different reasons then and now. Back then because it would be a great night out with his Glamily, just a huge bunch of friends having a great time together and also he would have had the perfect opportunity to look at Tommy's ass as he, as well as the other's would look at him when it would be his turn to throw. Now, now he had looked forward to it for the obvious ass checking but also and especially because he would get to spend time with 'his' Tommy. They would be able to hug and hold each other, talk and walk, laugh and even kiss without anyone thinking twice about it.

He had planned to gently work his way into convincing Tommy that letting the Glamily in on their feelings would be a good thing. He just didn't wanna kiss Tommy in front of them, he wanted to be able to French kiss his men whenever and for how long he wanted to.

Karma however was trying to tell him something. _Couldn't you have given me another sign instead of this fucked up migraine?_

 _'Not going_ _L_ _... Bad headache..._ '  _I'm sorry baby, you have no idea how saying no is hurting me more than this migraine._

Tommy replied quickly. _'Want me to stay with ya?'_

 _'No it's ok baby, you go and have fun. I'll take a double dose of painkillers and sleep it off. Besides I'm not in the most smiling moods at the moment_.' _  
_

_'Rough day?'_

_'Not really. Just tired and this fucking  killer migraine. Didn’t mean to be a spoilsport.'_

_'You're not man, quit saying that. Anything I can do?’_

_'You're already doing it sunshine.... xox'_

_'Didn't do anything! Text me if you need anything ok. Promise me.’_

_'Cross my heart. Tell the others the drinks tonight are on me.'  
_

He looked over the room, he had just finished re-doing Adam’s room when the first text back had come in. Adam’s room had been transformed into a picture straight out of some cheesy über-romantic  chick film; high glass candle holders everywhere some filled with vanilla scented candles others with plain white candles,  a wine cooler by the bed, a diner for two setting all dressed up in the middle of the room and goddamn rose petals randomly spread across the room.

Tommy sighed deeply before heading down to the hotel bar, they had all agreed on meeting there around 5 pm. None of them knew about him and Adam or his sissy romantic plans after the bowling game so he had to hide the deception that was flying through his body.

He walked in the bar, grateful to find everybody already there.

 "Adam is not coming, bad migraine. He says to have fun and that the drinks are on him.”

"What?”

“Ooooh damn, that sucks! Fuck he planned it for us."

“Fuck man!”

“Can we help?”

They all talked at once and they all knew Adam's migraine, it didn't happen often but when it did he looked as bad as he was surely feeling, avoiding all light, wincing at the slightest noise.

“Maybe Lane can arrange to reschedule, you know cancel tonight and move it to tomorrow night?” Sasha offered.

“It’s a nice offer boo but some of us already made plans for tomorrow evening.” Terrance reminded her.

After a short debate they all decided to go ahead with the bowling evening as planned, plans were being made to have a rematch, with Adam this time, when they were back home.

"Euh you guy's mind if I stay in too tonight? I wanna be here for him. I. bmean he was there when I was sick so you know." Tommy hides his face behind his bangs, shifting uncomfortably in his seat.

"You don't own us an explanation pretty kitty, you wanna stay then stay." Brook looked at him, a warm smile across her face.

“Ok then change of plans it is. What do you think guys, rendez-vous here in an hour?” Sasha proposed to the others. “We could go out for dinner before hitting the bowling and give Adam a heart attack when he sees the tab from the bar.” The laugh clearly audible in her voice as she spoke.

“Yep sounds like a plan.”

“Come on let's go and get ready kids.” Monte said, urging everyone to their feet.

“You ok bud?” Isaac asked as he laid his arm over Tommy's shoulder.

“Yeah I'm fine... I just ... I missed him Isaac, big time today and I ... I wanna be here for him, take care of him you know? It wouldn't feel right, me going out knowing he's like this; you know how he is when he gets his migraines.... I... I need to be here...” There was no need to act different around Isaac, he could drop his mask so to speak and let him see everything that was on his mind, good and bad.

“You don't need to explain dude, I wouldn't have expected anything else from you. You go and take of your man.”

Tommy froze for a second or two. _His man_ , hearing Isaac say these two simple words it made him feel weird or was it unsure.

“Not your man?” It was a simple and open question. Isaac’s voice warm and soft.

“I... It's been one day, one fucking day Isaac... I... We ... I don't know if I can call him that... Yet, maybe... Fuck I don't know...”

“Don't go there Tommy, I saw you guys yesterday remember. I know you guys finally are on the same book, maybe not the same page yet but definitively the same book. I saw the way you looked at each other, the way you guys walk and talk together, hell even the way you guys kiss off stage. And it warms my heart bud, you both deserve this. Like Adam justly said, baby steps are the way to go. It’s just how do I call him when it's just us you know?”

“Can we leave it to Adam just for now?”

 “Sure thing bud, forget I said anything.”

“ It’s ok”

“Come here.” Before pulling Tommy into a tight hug. He needed that, the unspoken support and love Isaac was giving him right now. He melted into the hug, giving back what he was receiving. When they let go Tommy kissed him softly on the cheek.

“I love you man, like seriously a whole fucking lot. Thanks.”

“Love you too bud. Anytime.” Isaac knew what Tommy was trying to say even before he had finished saying it.

“You good?”

“Yeah I'm good. Now go and get ready will ya and kick their royal dancing asses.”

Isaac laughed out loud as he headed for the elevator. “I will baby! We'll wipe the floor with them.”

Tommy stayed behind, looking down his watch, thinking about what to do next. He sends a message to Lane asking them their ETA. It turns out they’re thirty minutes away from the hotel.

He knew from the last time Adam had had a migraine what to do to help so he goes  back to Adam’s room and starts to prepare everything the best way he can: Cranking up the heating, closing the drapes, laying out a comfy sweatpants and Adam’s warmest hoody and a beanie. He knows where Adam kept his toiletry and found the bottle of painkillers he was looking for.

When everything is laid out he lights a few candles before switching off the lights before heading back down the lobby and waiting for Adam to arrive.

His heart clenched when his eyes caught a glimpse of Adam's face. No amount of makeup could have hidden the deep dark circles under his eyes, his skin color even paler then his own, tears rolling out of his left eye. The pain written all over his face as the sounds coming from the reception reach Adam's ears which caused a domino effect on the migraine pounding in his head.

Tommy walked over as fast and as quietly as he could, taking Adam's bag out of his hand and pressing a finger to his lips to silence him. The fact that Adam had let go of his bag without so much as a huff or a puff told Tommy all he needed to know.

Taking Adam's hand in his he maneuvered them both past the group of tourists that were checking in in the hotel and the insane amount of luggage that seemed to be everywhere and headed straight to the elevators. “Thank fuck for that," he whispered to himself as an elevator just opened as he was about to push the button. He gently pushed Adam in the corner of the elevator, using every ounce of his bodyweight to keep Adam up. He could hear and feel Adam's deep breaths, the tension in his muscles caused from fighting off the pain and the general exhausted state he was in when he rested his head on Tommy's shoulder.

"i've got you baby." As he put his arms around him, giving him all the comfort he had in him.

When they reached the fourth floor Tommy guided Adam to his room, he swiped the magnetic card and pushed the door further open with his foot.

A faint light brightened up the room coming from the few candles Tommy had lit before leaving the room earlier, the air warm from the heating Tommy had cranked up to maximum.

Tommy didn't let go of Adam until he sat on the edge of the bed. Without words he first took of his own hoodie before picking up the pain meds and the clothes he had laid out for Adam. He might be a cold ass chicken in normal circumstances right now the room was more than warm enough for him.

As he returned to Adam's side he found Adam with his head in his hands, the heel of his left hand applying pressure on his left eye to ease some of the excruciating pain. A soft touch on Adam’s knee to warn him of his presence before presenting him the 2 pills in his hands and a bottle of room temperature chilled water. 

"Let me baby," he said before starting to undress Adam. The boots and socks went first and then came Adam's soft grey cardigan and black shirt only to be replaced by a comfy warm t-shirt and Adam's warmest hoodie. Tommy had hung the T-shirt on the wall radiator in the bathroom making it feel nicely warm as if it just came out of the dryer.

“Sit here honeybun, I’m gonna remove your make-up for you.” Adam felt a warm wash cloth on his face, gentle yet steady movements removing most of his make-up. They both knew it was impossible to get everything off in his current state, the pain behind his eye made the slightest touch almost unbearable. When Tommy was satisfied with his work he gently pressed a dry towel to Adam’s face.

"Can you stand baby? You can lean on my shoulders if you need."

A slight nod was all Adam managed. Moving methodically and swiftly Adam was soon un- and redressed and laid down on the bed under a layer of blankets and was being tucked under like a baby.

“Tommy.” It was nothing more than a whisper.

“Shhh baby, I’m right here. I’m gonna change and I’ll be right back.”

Tommy changed into a pair of cotton sleeping pants and a t-shirt. As he returned to Adam’s side he could see Adam had curled up into a ball, the cape of his hoodie pulled over the left sore side of his head. Adam had also moved down the bed making place for Tommy to sit between the headboard and himself.

Thanking his lucky stars for being a tiny dude he gently moved onto the bed, positioning himself behind Adam, placing his legs on either side of him. As soon as he sits comfortably he feels and sees Adam’s hands and arms move, Adam’s left arm slides under and around his thigh, his right blindly reaches upwards and he laces his fingers between Adam’s squeezing their fingers together and softly whispering; “Try to get some sleep baby, I’ll be right here. I’m not going anywhere.”

Tommy’s listened as Adam’s breath slows and deepens, sleep is taking him over and he pulls the blankets up covering Adam even more. When Adam lays fast asleep between his legs, he looks down trying to see his face hidden away under a hoodie and 2 blankets. Seeing Adam this small, this affected by pain isn't right. Adam, who is larger than life, strong and fierceless. Adam, who had been and still is a huge rock in his life on which he can build and thrust. Just at that time Adam somewhat moves in his sleep, slightly lifting his head. The candlelight engulfing the room sheds a warm glow on Adam's face making him almost radiate from within. No matter how hard he tried he has to touch, had to touch Adam's face. His hands moved so slowly, almost afraid to touch, towards those lips, those sacred lips, those lips he had kissed God knows how many times both off and on stage as friends, as a fan-service, those lips he had kissed the past few days as he poured, shared his love into Adam. He loved Adam's lips, always had. They were so full and warm and soft often coated with a taste of lipgloss or lipstick or - his personal favorite - Adam's tea.

As his fingers gently touched Adam's lower lip his tongue licked his own and he could taste it, he could actually taste Adam's tea coated taste. _God baby._ His fingers ever so slowly brushed over Adam's lips, trailing a path over Adam's freckles. He smiled to himself remembering how often he had watched, counted like really counted them one by one and fucking wished he could actually be a freckle on Adam's lips. As much as he loved on stage Adam Tommy loved off stage Adam even more, those freckles on Adam's lips were a kink waiting to surface.

He couldn’t hold back, without taking his eyes away of Adam he searched blindly for his phone he had placed under one of the pillows in the bed. Unlocking the screen, he scrolled to the note-application and began to type something down:

 

_“Home”_

 

_Stop looking at me like that!  
What the hell are you looking at?  
You guys are such assholes!  
Always giving me that straight up in my face look._

_I’m so fucking jealous of you guys!  
Like seriously borderline wacko jealous.  
Y’all look so fierce, so aware of yourselves, not a tiny bit ashamed of showing yourselves.  
Hell you’re all out and proud about it._

_Front row seats to every feeling, every taste, every sensation.  
You guys really have no idea of my fascination.  
I hide it, well I think I do, I fucking hope I do.  
Cause really, you’d fucking laugh right now._

_I wished and I still wish I’d have some magical powers.  
Being a witch or a genie or some kick ass warlock.  
Having the power to shift, to change and become one of you.  
To hang with you guys, every minute of every day for the rest of our lives._

_I’d like that, yeah, I’d like that a lot!  
Taking my place, between you guys, as a new freckle on those gorgeous lips._


	9. Chapter 9

Tommy being Mister Insomnia spends most of the night being awake either looking down at Adam or staring at the flame of the candle closest to the bed. Both have a calming effect on him and he finds himself in perfect harmony with the Universe and himself. As he watches and listens to the sleeping man tucked away between his legs his mind and heart reminds him of the changes that have taken place in these last 72 hours. Saying it has been an emotional rollercoaster is, without a doubt, _the_ biggest understatement of the year. Hell, who was he kidding, it’s probably the biggest understatement of his life so far.

Granted, neither Tommy nor Adam were your ‘average’ kind of men, they had always done things their way; had and always would be a little different from everybody else but to say they had started their relation off with a bang was an euphemism to say the least.

As time went by some of the candles died out changing the atmosphere in the room, making it harder for Tommy to see much of Adam anymore. Reaching out ever so gently he searched and found Adam’s hands, delicately lacing their fingers together.

Hidden in the darkness of the room and surrounded by a deep and steady breathing coming from Adam Tommy's mind drifts off to memories of him and Adam in Cabo. They had spent a lazy day by the pool joking and goofing around, laughing over basically anything and nothing, acting like a bunch of kids all together while tossing each other in the pool, flipping over each other pool floats. He couldn't help but smile as he remembered, he may have a few blanks in his memories from that trip; this memory he was sure of. He had lost count on how many times he was sent flying in, over and under water. He had been no match for Adam or Sutan or even the rest of them. Sure he had won a few fights, in the end however, he had lost ‘the war of the pool’ - big time.

After the swimming came a barbecue by the pool and the booze had kept flowing richly all evening leaving them way, way drunk. All had passed out or fell asleep at some point and Adam was no different, he had passed out his head resting in Tommy's lap, his body half sitting on the ground, half hanging on or was it over Tommy's long chair, his memory was a little vague on this particular detail. They were having some - very interesting he has no doubt - drunken men conversation about sports of all things! Adam had been on a role, explaining the rules of some sport to begin with, he doesn't remember what or who or how but he definitely remembers their sports related conversation and David Beckham's free kick technique. Up until this day he has no idea how the hell David Beckham's fucking technique ended up in their conversation or even how the dude ended up in their conversation to begin with cause at that point all he could think was: who the fucking fuck is David Beckham.

Tommy shrugs as he relives the memory, muttering silently to himself or was is subconsciously to Adam. “Who gives a shit right. I mean we were drunk. So fucking drunk, we can’t be held responsible for our actions right?”

Adam had been in the middle of explaining something about 'ball pressure', poking his finger into Tommy's chest to emphasize something. He doesn't remember what he said to that but whatever it was it caused Adam to drunk-pout him and, not without a huge amount of drama, dropping his head in disbelief in Tommy's lap. Tommy had laughed his ass off at the display of drunken drama before him only to come to realise, after God knows how many minutes, that Miss Drama Queen was no longer in a talk-capable mood. He might have been drunk out of his mind, his brain had somehow managed to process the given fact that Adam was out cold in his lap.

Tommy remembers how eventually he tried to wake up Adam because he wasn’t exactly seated in the most comfortable position and he really, really wanted to pass out in his own bed. After attempt number who-gives-a-shit Adam shifted a bit, pressing his head into Tommy’s groin in the process.

“Adam… Babyboy… Wake up. Come on man, move will ya.” He hadn’t stop poking, gently pushing and shoving his fingers into Adam’s side to make him wake up long enough to move. Adam’s brain finally had picked up on the poking and pushing and Tommy’s pleas to move. He moved, Adam definitely moved; he mumbled something Tommy couldn’t understand and pressed his face into Tommy’s groin, hard and shamelessly, sniffing up Tommy’s private parts. It shocked him, well more surprised him, of all things _this_ he hadn’t expect – at all. Adam started mumbling about how good he smelled, about how he wanted to get his hands on Tommy’s dick and suck his brain out through his dick.

As on queue Tommy’s private parts seems to remember the same memory his brain is having, his dick coming more and more alive as a result of it. Ignoring the growing feeling in his pants he drifts back to his memory. In the end he had managed to get Adam away from his groin and somewhat up on his feet – he’s still not sure how the hell he had managed that but _again,_ in the end who gives a shit. Clinging on to each other they made their way zigzagging up to the closest room, it being Tommy’s room. They had hit a wall, stumbled over their own feet God knows how many times, knocked over a chair and he was sure of it some other stuff before finally reaching his room and crashing onto his bed giggling like a pair of teenage girls. Adam had refused to let go of Tommy, holding and pulling him on top of him.

 That’s when it happened; that what Adam never spoke of, claiming a total blackout about the event after the barbeque and Tommy never had a reason not to believe him and that what Tommy swore to himself he would never ever tell Adam. The words had come out slurring, Adam’s tongue thick due to the large quantity of drinks. “I love you baby, don’t leave me … Need you close. Marry me, say you will baby. Say you’ll always be mine.” For some alcohol-induced-weird-fucked-up reason this was when his feelings for Adam had surfaced for the first time. It wasn’t so much what Adam had said, hell he could have said whatever the hell he wanted. No it was the way he had looked at Tommy before literally passing out again, snoring as if he was knocking down an entire forest. It was the way he had touched Tommy’s face; gently, loving and full of honesty.

In this unbelievable scene, this hilarious moment, despite the large quantity of consumed alcohol Tommy had first begun to realize he had more than just friendship feelings for Adam. They had always been close, had almost since day one developed a very natural, very physical bond. The gentle touches they had when they walked behind or next to each other, the hugs they shared upon greeting each other in the morning or when they said goodnight. People who didn't know them could easily mistake the scene as two friends or family members greeting each other after a long period of absence. They hugged intensely, fiercely, loving the feeling of the other one's presence, of the weight of the other's body. They had developed a 6th sense for each other, always knowing where the other seemed to be, understanding each other without the need for words. They were on the same pages of so many books and damn it felt good. It felt really good to have such a friend in his life, it felt good to have Adam in his life and just as much as he was in Adam’s life at the same time, much to his regret, they weren’t.

His hands searched and had found Adam's head, gently playing and brushing through his hair. Softly touching any part of skin he could get his fingers on and in doing so scraping over those little stubbles that start to cover Adam's skin. He never said it out loud but seeing Adam with a two day old stubble was simply breath taking, it made him look even fiercer and God knows Adam’s fierceness factor was already going through the roof. As his fingers continued to brush over Adam’s cheeks sleep took over and this time, feeling the presence of the man he loved so dearly close to him, he let himself drift off.

A few hours had gone by when Adam wakes up, feeling a little lost at first, not realizing what or how or even where he is and who’s limps he’s feeling around him before he remembers. He’s sweaty, his t-shirt literally soaked, hair stuck to his face and more importantly feeling human again. He still has a bad headache but at least he can manage to move his head without flinching at the slightest movement.

“Tommy…. Tommy baby, wake up….”

“Hmmm?” It takes a full 2 seconds before his brains kicks in and he finds himself wade awake looking down at Adam with a worried look who seemed to have kicked back the blankets. “Adam! You ok baby?”

“Need to pee.”

“Ow, ok, let me move out of your way baby. You need a hand getting out of bed?”

“I think I’ll manage.”

Tommy moves his right leg out of the way and holds out his hands to Adam to help him up and out of the bed. It takes a while, Adam’s head is still throbbing hard and so he makes slow movements as he lifts his body from the bed and walks over to the bathroom.

Using his phone as a flashlight he gets out of bed and lights two new candles in the room. When Adam eventually comes out of the bathroom he’s right there by Adam’s side.

“How you feeling sweetie?”

“Bad… Sweaty… Better though, head doesn’t hurt as much anymore.” Adam’s quiet voice tells him more than enough though.

Tommy takes Adam’s hand and leads him to the bed. “Sit here baby, I’m gonna get you a clean t-shirt and your meds.” Before Adam can say anything back he presses a gentle kiss to Adam’s lips. “Don’t say anything Adam, let me take care of you alright.”

He walks over to Adam’s open suitcase and gets out a fresh t-shirt and hands it over to Adam. “You need a hand with that?”

“No, I got it.”

He watches Adam take off his hoodie, shivering at the loss of fabric and shivering even more when he takes off his t-shirt. Tommy can see Adam’s naked upper body react to the cold and it takes him all but three seconds to be at his side helping him put on the fresh t-shirt followed by his warm hoodie. “Here baby, takes these,” he says as he hand over two new pills to Adam and a bottle of water.

“Get back to bed baby, I’m gonna take a piss. I’ll be right there.”

As he returns he finds Adam in the same position, sitting on the edge of the bed, slightly shivering. “Adam? Come on honeybun, let’s get you back in bed. Let’s get you warmed up shall we.”

He moves Adam back to bed, pulls the cape of his hoodie back over his head and guides him under the covers before slipping under them himself on Adam’s left side. As soon as he moves closer to Adam he can feel him shift, burying his head in the crook of his neck in search of some extra heat and comfort.

“That’s right. Come here baby, I’m right here.” He feels Adam leg slip between his, Adam’s right arm across his chest as he drifts back to sleep. This might not be what he had in mind when he had planned his surprise in the first place Tommy wouldn’t want to trade this moment for anything in the world, despite Adam’s miserable state this was a perfect moment in all its imperfectness.


	10. Chapter 10

Some many hours later Adam wakes up again and doesn’t have to think twice about where he is or who’s limps and body are pressed against his own. Tommy is spooning him, right arm protectively around his chest and his left arm and hand seem to have found a way onto Adam’s head. A soft ray of sunlight makes his way in the room underneath the heavy curtains.  He gently moves his head as it’s resting on the pillow and is more than happy when it does confirm what he has been feeling when he woke up; his migraine is no more!

Feeling the movements, feeling a body stretching next to his Tommy opens his eyes to see a pair of blue eyes looking back at him.

“Hi.”

“Morning Sunshine.”

“How you’re feeling babe?”

“Sweaty, hungry and look," gently shaking his head from left to right. “I’m feeling almost as good as new.” Seeing Tommy leaning in for a kiss however he pulls away. He's a sweaty mess, with a no doubt horrible morning breath. No way he would kiss Tommy like this.

Tommy raises eyebrow to Adam’s movements “Adam?”

Hiding his mouth behind his hands the words came out, “Morning breath.”

“Are you fucking kidding me!? Since when has that stopped us before? Or is that only allowed as being friends? Move your hand away honeybun, let’s stink together.” Not waiting for Adam to say anything back he pushed his hands away and pressed their lips together.  “Yeah, this is better. Much better, “ feeling Adam kiss back is something that will never be bad, no matter what his breath turns out to be in the morning.

They end up in each other’s arms again, Tommy being the one curled up in Adam’s strong hold. “Thank you Sunshine.”

“For what?”

“For going all ‘Mommy Tommy’on me. Really baby, thank you.”

“Don’t mention it, plus you did the same for me remember?”

“Not the same.”

“Dude! So totally the same!”

“Moody…”

“Just woke up for fuck sake! Am tired, plus being a Tommy Nurse is a hard job you know and besides you’re not the only one who’s hungry.”

“Breakfast in bed?”

“Fuck yeah! What do you wanna have?”

Adam locks their lips back together and after some lazy kissing they both end up getting out of bed. Tommy’s makes his way to the bathroom first and is in the middle of finishing brushing his teeth when Adam walks in. “Need to pee babe.”

“Bathroom’s all yours, I’m gonna order breakfast in five, you better tell me what you want,” smacking Adam’s ass as he makes his way to the door.

Tommy sighs looking around the room; the high glass candle holders, the rose petals randomly spread across the room where his dinner for two setting had been all dressed up. He sits down on one of the chairs, idly playing with some rose petals zoned out in his own Universe that is his mind.

It’s not until he feels the warmth of the sun on his back, a warm peppermint breath next to his hear and the feeling of someone’s shower damp hair on the side of his face that he snaps out of it. “Baby? Rose petals? Dinner for two settings? What…?”

A deep blush makes his way up to Tommy's cheeks, avoiding the look in Adam's eyes he answers; “Was gonna to surprise you with it after the bowling, my way of saying thanks for you know… You making me see things,” and he laces their fingers together squeezing them gently, “for giving me this.”

“And they say I’m the sucker for romancing the shit out of my boyfriends,” moving and dropping down on his knees so he’s face to face with Tommy and presses their lips together. His hands grabbing hold of the smaller frame before him, pulling him of his chair and into his lap. They end up sitting like that for a while, sharing cuddles and sweet, lazy kisses. Eventually the kissing ends as both their stomachs start to remind them they are in need of food.

Adam ushers Tommy to the bathroom, telling him to go and enjoy the shower as he will take care of ordering breakfast. A long shower later, dressed in a clean t-shirt and sweatpants Tommy comes back out of the bathroom bare footed and hums as the smell of coffee fills his nostrils. The smell of eggs and backed bacon making his mouth water. Breakfast is delicious and they eat mostly in silent, enjoying each other’s company.

The boys are back cuddling on the bed when a valet comes to pick up their plates later on. As soon as he leaves the room Adam leaves the warmth of Tommy embrace and walks over to his suitcase and starts picking out clothes; black jeans, boots, black t-shirt and a deep blue shirt on top of it.

“Where the fuck do you think you’re going mister?”

Adam turns around, a little baffled by the authority in Tommy’s voice. “Out, with you. I’m gonna take you out baby. I’m feeling ok again, I swear, I promised myself I would woo you off your feet and enjoy every second of every minute with you and that’s exactly what I’m gonna do even it is only for a few hours.”

“I swear Lambert if you don’t get that fucking ass of yours back in that fucking bed I’m not gonna be held responsible for my fucking actions!”

Adam looks at Tommy completely stunned, wondering where the hell this was coming from. “Baby?”

“Don’t you baby me! You heard me just fine! GET YOUR ASS BACK IN THAT BED! I’m not asking again Adam! You are going to spend the rest of the day here, with me, in and on this bed and that’s final! I don’t care how good you say you’re fucking feeling, you are going to fucking listen to your body and rest as you should on your day off!"

“Are you mad at me?”

“What!? No! No, I’m not mad at you.”

“Since when did you get this bossy then?”

“Since I picked you up less than 24 hours ago looking like a fucking freaking cadaver! You looked like hell yesterday and I… I … ”

Tommy’s voice goes up an octave, something that only happens on very rare occasions and Adam knows he’s obviously very upset about something. He gets into Tommy’s space, gently cupping his face between his hands and locking into Tommy’s eyes. “Talk to me sunshine, what’s wrong?”

“Nothing’s wrong.”

“Don’t gimme that bullshit baby, something’s obviously bothering you. It’s written all over you face. Come on baby, talk to me. No more hiding stuff between us remember?” There’s nothing but love and genuine affection in Adam’s voice and gaze, not a single hint of reproach.

“I know your migraines Adam! I’ve seen you like that before remember and I know it takes you more than a few hours to recuperate from them. Plus I didn’t like seeing you hurt ok! It hurt me so seeing you that small. It’s not right you know? I mean, you’re larger than life for fuck sake. I don’t care if you mock me or not or if you think I’m being childish I just wanna spent the rest of the day here with you and … “

Adam never let him finish, his lips gently pressed against Tommy’s. It’s not a deep kiss or even a long one yet the feeling that is poured into the other is so much more intense. “Who the hell do I have to thank for letting me find such an amazing man who loves me and lets me love him back?”

“No fucking idea babe. Anyone I know?” Tommy asks as he guides them both back to the bed.

Adam pokes him playfully in the side. “Don’t know. I’ll introduce you one day if you want though,” following Tommy on the bed. “I get to choose the movies.”

“Says who man?”

“Hey! I’m still recovering here from a near death experience; I’m allowed to choose … Please??”

There was just no way Tommy could deny Adam anything with that beaten-puppy-with-a-killer-pout face. “Oy. I am so beginning to regret us staying in here.” Leaning over to the reach the phone next to the bed he went on; “Just so you know, I’m picking the food later and for the record, no rabbit food for you today! Food let’s say at 2 PM, between movies?”

Reaching out for the remote, Adam began scrolling through the pay per view menu. “Sounds good to me, looks like you’ve got yourself a date baby, order whatever you like.”

Neither one paid much attention to the other as they were busy with their own task at hand. Tommy ordering their food and drinks and Adam picking the first movie and mentally making a note to himself for the second. Adam had selected the first movie and was waiting for Tommy to finish up his call with room service. He didn’t need to look back to know he’d finished and had discovered the movie he had picked.

“You have got to be fucking kidding me!! Pretty Woman?!? Seriously??” Moving closer to Adam he placed his hand on his forehead. “Should have known it, you’re still burning up. You can thank your lucky stars, I’m only indulging this cause you’re obviously delirious or some shit.” Pulling Adam closer to him he continued, “come on you dork, if we’re gonna watch that shit might as well do it right.”

Adam looked at him with a _‘huh?’_ expression on his face.

“I am so NOT curling up to you over this movie Adam, you can so totally forget that. You get to be the chick here, so you are going to curl up to me for once.” He had already placed himself against the headboard of the bed, fluffy pillows stuffed behind his back. Opening his arms to invite Adam in.

“Don’t wanna crush you baby, I’m bigger then…”

“Will you get your ass over here and curl up to me! I’m not made out of porcelain for fuck sake! Come on baby, let me hold you.” Hazel eyes caught Adam’s gaze showing nothing but love, love and more love. Crawling over to the waiting man he curled himself up between his legs, resting his head against his shoulder, melting away when he could see and feel tattooed skin holding him close. How could he not grab hold of the arms holding him before turning his head trying to steal a kiss.

They watched in silence and Tommy would never ever admit it out loud; he actually enjoyed it. The way Adam reacted to the movie, the way his laughter filled the room at the ‘duck-in-the-bathtub-scene’, the way they had laced their fingers together and above all the feeling of Adam’s bodyweight pinning him down so to speak. Richard Gere was in the middle of climbing up to Julia Roberts' window when he heard Adam’s voice again.

“I would totally do that for you you know.”

“Do what baby?”

“That.. Climbing a fire staircase, make a huge fool of myself only to lock my lips on yours.” As he says the words he’s shifting between Tommy’s legs, gently maneuvering him so he ends up lying down instead of sitting behind Adam and locks lips with him.

One soft chaste lip lock is followed by another and another. Lips dancing together, teasing each other, the light licks of a tongue against the other ones lips until finally mouths open up. Both men losing all notion of time and their surroundings, they’re making out so slowly, so softly, so full of emotion.

Adam ends up making his way along Tommy’s jaw, softly kissing, nibbling and licking each inch of skin he encounters. When he reaches Tommy’s neck the worshipping continues; shifting and moving along when Tommy’s moves his neck and in doing so granting Adam a better access. “Mmmm… Your skin tastes so good baby.”

“Yeah?”

“Oh yeah,” he says before continuing his lovemaking to Tommy’s skin. “Ooh Sunshine I want you so much baby. Gosh, you’re messing so much with me self-control here.”

“Yeah?”

“God yes…”

Feeling Tommy’s hands guiding him back up he follows his lead until their mouths lock again this time with a touch of two more passion. Eventually Tommy breaks the kiss only to proceed onto kissing Adam in the same way he had kissed him. The warmth of the others breath leaves both their skin damp and warm. Their breathing heavier, their heart rate definitely going up, their pants showing curves that weren’t their 5 minutes ago.

“Tell me…”

“What baby? What do you want to hear?”

“Tell me… Tell me how much…” Tommy’s words are cut off by Adam’s mouth on his. The kiss is filled with lust, want, passion and every other brain-screwing emotion only to break it to mutter a few words, a sentence pronounced with a wretched voice, to proceed in the worshipping of the other’s skin.

“Want to hear me saying how much I want you?”

“Yes…”

“Want me to tell you word for word?”

“Yes…” It’s barely a whisper; Tommy seems to have lost all control over his voice, hell over his entire body even at this stage.

“Am so hard baby …. All for you … Because of you … Only you…”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah baby… Only you…”

“Mine.”

“Yours…”

“Mmmm … More, Adam please … Tell me more…”

Leaning closer to his face Adam is more than happy to comply Tommy’s request. “Fuck baby, I wanna fuck you so bad right now. I wanna hear you scream my name as you come.”

“Yeah?”

“Yes… Feeling you move under me like this, all want and needy. That’s it baby rub yourself against me. Let me feel you.”

“Mmmmmm … Adam … I … I …” Adam cuts him off once again and he feels Adam tongue playing with his. He’s losing all control of his hips and they end up moving, bucking up every so often against the body pinning them down. Adam nibbles a path along his jugulars and he feels his own goddamn heart pulsing in his neck.

“Tell me baby… Tell me…”

“Am hard too honeybun … So fucking hard.”

“I know…” God does Adam know it, it’s the first time he’s felt Tommy hard on, despite all their layers of clothing he can’t get enough of the feeling. Grinding down ever more into Tommy, desperate to make this feeling last and last.

Tommy’s voice is so wrecked, so hoarse, so goddamn sexy. “Yours baby… Only yours…”

“Mine… All mine”

“Yours…”

Hands finally start to roam on the other ones body, hips start moving in sync , one hardness pressed against the other.

“Adam … I … Make … I need…”


	11. Chapter 11

Tommy’s words causes a huge reaction inside Adam’s body, every single one of his cells seems to be on fire. Every touch, every kiss rushes through his very being and touches the core of his soul. The want, the desire to make this good for Tommy as well as taking baby steps conflicts for a few seconds and he finds himself staring or better said drowning in those dark hazel eyes. “You like this baby?”

“Yes…” It’s barely audible, somewhere between a whisper and a whimper.

Encouraged by the ongoing movement of Tommy’s hips Adam moves again, meeting Tommy’s thrusts. “Wanna come babe? Wanna cream your pants?”

“Yes… Pl… Please…”

“Anything you want baby … Gonna make you feel so good…”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah… I’m …. ,” shifting a bit, Adam tries to find a bit more leverage to grind harder into Tommy and gets instant gratification as he hears a loud moan escape his lips. He feels 2 hands on his ass, squeezing them through his sweatpants. Hips bucking into him, a hardness that isn’t his own in a desperate blinding search of that final release.

“Fuck… Fuck! FUCK!!!!!”

“That’s it baby…. Come …. I can’t … Can’t hold much longer…”

A firework, bigger than the one on the 4th of July ignites inside of Tommy and explodes into his sleeping pants and he clings onto Adam for dear life as he rides it out. Adam will never know what finally pushed out his own orgasm; seeing Tommy’s totally blissed out face as he came, the totally-out-of-this-world sounds he made, the fact that he made Tommy fall apart like this or the fact that this was their first orgasm together or all of the above combined.

Collapsing onto Tommy, Adam tries to catch his breath for a few seconds before trying to roll off of Tommy only to feel him tighten his grip. “No… Don’t, not yet.”

“Baby, I don’t wanna end up crushing you. Plus we need to clean up.”

Tightening his grip again, burying his face somewhere between Adam’s shoulder and neck Tommy’s voice ends up coming out muffled and hoarse at the same time, “No, you’re not and I don’t care. I’ll step into the shower in my pants if needed be. Please honeybun, stay like this. I like the feeling…”

“Aw baby, come here,” Adam no longer fights the attempt to somehow hold up his bodyweight and lets his body go limp, covering every inch of the body underneath him. He ends up pulling a pillow closer to rest his head on. They end up lying like this for some time, in total silence, breathing in the other one’s post-orgasm-scent and listening to each other’s breathing. Adam’s fingers wander on Tommy’s cheek, idly drawing something into the stubbles of his beard.

“I don’t wanna move, don’t ever wanna move. I don’t wanna go back home Adam. I wanna… I … I don’t wanna let go…”

“I know baby, God I know.”

“We just… I mean, we’re just… And I …”

Adam gently pushes Tommy’s face to the side until their foreheads meet, “We’ll make it sunshine. I promise you we will. I’m not letting you go, ever!”

“Ever?”

“Never baby! Never letting you go.”

They stay like this for a long time, Adam moved a little bit to end half on top of Tommy, half on his side. Eventually they do move, the dried cum itching and yes, Tommy does ends up being crushed under Adam’s weight. Adam goes to clean up first, Tommy doing the same once he’s out of the bathroom. They spend the rest of their London time together on the bed, watching Adam’s second movie choice, “ _ET”._ They both cry their eyes out at the scene of ET dying and at the end, Tommy being his usual self by saying, “Some men we are, I mean look at us, fuck we’re even worse than some fucking chicks at the movies!” It sends Adam in a laughing fit and Tommy just can’t resist the infectious sound of Adam's laughter and ends up laughing as loud as Adam.

As time has reached 9 pm Isaac sends Tommy a text saying he took care or his luggage and that everything is packed and ready to leave for the airport. They both change into regular clothes, Tommy going into the bathroom to change while Adam changes in the room. “We do this your way baby, I’ll follow your lead ok?” Tommy nods silently, fisting Adam’s shirt for comfort. After that everything slow down, time slows down; the way down stairs where the rest of the Glamily is already waiting. They all get around Adam asking how he’s feeling, hugging both boys and Sasha tells them triumphantly that they won the bowling battle. She, Brooke and Taylor won a ‘go-for’ for an entire week and Isaac, Monte and Terrance roll their eyes almost at the same time, already knowing all too well they’re in for some very strange requests.

The ride to the airport doesn’t take all that long, Tommy – as usual – close to Adam’s side and Adam’s arm around his shoulder and it seems to help Tommy relax. He manages to unwind and join in the others as the goof around, telling dumb ass jokes and ends up cracking up a few times at the hilarious ‘go-for-abuse’ by Sasha, Brooke and Taylor. They all check in, board the airplane and also as usual Tommy and Adam take seat next to each other. Isaac and Monte behind them, Brooke and Sasha in front of them.

The plain is still ascending when Adam looks over at Tommy, his bangs covering almost his entire face as he stares at some invisible spot on the back of Sasha’s seat. “Baby?” Tommy doesn’t respond, instead he turns his head to the side, away from him. Adam leans closer to Tommy and laces their fingers together; “Tommy? Do you feel this baby?” squeezing their fingers together, “remember it, remember how it feels sunshine, our fingers laced together.”

“Adam...”

“Remember it baby, imprint it in your mind. This, what you’re feeling right now, this is real baby. That’s us, you and me, together.” When Tommy squeezes back Adam’s heart skips a beat, “Yeah baby, that right here, what you’re doing right now, that’s real and it’s ours.”

“I can’t do this Adam. I don’t know what to do with myself. Goddamn it!! I… I can’t breathe.”

“Breathe baby, breathe with me. Come on, together.” Adam takes in a deep breath and exhales slowly, nudging silently to Tommy to join him which he does. The boys take a few breaths together until Tommy’s panic attack has subsided.

They never unlace their fingers during the remaining of the flight. They end up watching some lame ass movie who’s title’s not even worth mentioning. They chit _and_ chat until sleep takes them under.

Tommy’s the first to wake up when the ‘fasten-your-seatbelts-alarm’ goes off. His hand and fingers feel totally numb and despite the uncomfortable feeling he gets when he tries to pull them from Adam’s grip he can’t help but smile. Seeing and damn well (not) feeling their laced fingers warms his heart in a ridiculous way as he remembers Adam’s words; _“Remember this, this is real. This is us.”_

“I hear you baby, this is ours.”

He gentle shakes Adam’s arm, ‘’Honeybun? Adam? Baby wake up, we’ve started descending.”

“Mmmmmm, 2 more minutes.”

“No can do sleepyhead, we’re in fucking airplane remember? Come on big fella, open your eyes.”

“Already?” A series of yawns follows. He rubs his eyes and stretches in his seat or at least makes a fairly decent attempt at it.  

“Yeah.”

Before they know it the plane lands and they find themselves following the others on route to pick up their luggage. Brooke’s the first who has everything; Adam’s the last to get all of his stuff. Once everyone has passed customs none of them seem to be able to walk fast enough. They all wanna hug the living shit out of their friends and family who are waiting for them; Sasha’s girl, Brooke’s fiancé, Isaac’s wife Sophie are the first to get a glimpse of their loved ones. Bags get dropped as they meet each other running halfway jumping into each other’s arms. Taylor’s mom is next in line who gets the hug someone. Terrance and Sutan almost get knocked over as friends jump on both men. Monte, Adam and Tommy aren’t being picked up and the record company has arranged a waiting car – with chauffeur – for each and every one of them.

Hugs, kisses and a few slaps on the ass are exchanged as one by one start to leave with their loved ones after saying goodbye to the Glamily. In the end Tommy and Adam are the only ones still standing in the airport, their luggage already been loaded in their respective waiting cars.

Tommy is the one making the first move, making his way over to Adam, grabbing hold of the hem of his shirt. Without thinking they both do what comes naturally to them; Tommy’s arms folds themselves around Adam’s waist while Adam’s arms curl around Tommy’s shoulders, pulling him as close to his chest as he can. Both men tighten their hold; hugging so fiercely they can almost feel the other one’s heartbeat. Adam ends up resting his head on top of Tommy’s who has face buried deeply in Adam’s vest. “Adam…”

“I know baby…”

“I’ll remember, I promise.” The vest muffles the sound of Tommy’s words a bit.

“Me too baby, I’ll remember too.”

“Text me when you’re home? I’ll do too.”

“You know I will sunshine.”

Both cars follow each other until they reach the highway, Tommy watches Adam’s car take a turn to left while his takes a turn to the right. With stinging eyes he places his hands on top of each other and laces his own fingers together. _I remember Adam, I remember._


	12. Chapter 12

It's been four days, four _long_ days without seeing each other; Tommy had been busy visiting his mom and sister and rehearsing with the band for the upcoming gig at Nokia while Adam had a bunch of interviews to attend to. They had texted - a lot, they had called each other - a lot. They had found a little calling arrangement without even talking about it; Tommy made the first call of the day once he woke up and had his first cup of coffee, Adam would make the last one before he would go to bed.

Every other one in between was in function of a need, a longing, the missing of the other one's voice and timing. They went from just-wanted-to-say-hi calls to silly laughter filled nonsense calls to simply telling the other what had happened the last hour or so to the heartbreaking miss-you-so-much calls.

Every time he'd seen Adam's name appear on the screen of his phone there was no denying it, his heart skipped a beat, his lips curling up into the biggest brightest smile and even if he would deny it until his dying day a blush appeared on his cheeks almost every time. They may not have been together physically these last four days, in their hearts, thoughts and dreams they never left each other's side.

The closer he got to Adam's house the more nervous he was getting, part of him couldn't wait to see the man of his dreams and the other part of him was scared shitless. He longed for Adam's touch, he craved to be touched and to touch himself and yet it scared him more than anything even if they always had been close and physical with each other it was anything but the same. There is a huge difference between touching a friend and touching a person you’ve given your heart.

Knowing the access code to open the gate to Adam's house he drives up to the house parking his car in front of it. Turning of the engine he took a few moments to calm himself before getting out and grabbing his bag from the backseat. Walking over to the front door seemed like to take forever causing his heart rate to go up, for all kind of strange creatures to start flying around is his stomach; Tommy’s mouth end up feeling as dry as the Sahara Dessert, his hands sweaty. Basically: he’s nervous as hell! _Fuck! Get a fucking grip of yourself Goddamn it!_

Finally reaching the front door he takes a few deep breaths in a failed attempt to calm his nerves. As he was about to ring the doorbell he notices the front door already open. _What the hell?!?_ This was so unlike Adam. Pulling out his phone Tommy checked Adam’s last text again. ‘ _Fuck traffic! So totally stuck! Let yourself in baby. I should be there by 8 pm. xxx’_

He knocked before pushing the door open a bit more.  "Adam? It’s me Tommy.”

He couldn't see much from where he was standing so he pushed the door open with his foot, dropping his bag at his feet as he stepped inside the house. He could barely see anything, the entire hallway was plunged into a dark and yet warm glow at the same time, it was an unreal looking sight. For a few seconds it spooked the hell out of Tommy, it made him think of some cheap B-horror movie with too much fake screaming and fake boobs chicks.

“Adam? Baby, you in here?”

There was absolutely no sound in the house and it was freaky, there was always some form of sound in Adam’s house whether it’s Adam’s humming or singing or music blasting trough his high tech surround installation. Tommy couldn’t remember the house ever being this quiet. Walking further down the hallway he finally saw a smallish glow dancing upwards onto the far end wall, the more he walked towards the dancing glow the bigger and warmer it became until he could see all the tea lights, black and white ones, they were everywhere creating a path for Tommy to follow, he walked passed by the open kitchen straight up the stairs.

“Adam? What’s going on? Come on baby, this shit isn’t funny.” He would have kicked his own ass if he could as he realized what and especially _how_ it came out. _Great! Just fucking great! I’m starting to sound like some fucking chick!! “This shit isn’t funny?!?” What the fucking fuck was I thinking?  
_

Slowly walking up the stairs he took his time looking around, absorbing in the tangible atmosphere in the house. The more he climbed up the stairs the more he could feel it, almost touch it. The air was filled with a tension he couldn’t quite describe. It was something magical, something warm, something enchanting almost electrifying that caused all of his nerves to relax and he let himself be submerged by whatever this electricity was. The dancing flames coming from the tea lights sure as hell helped with the creation of the magical and warm feeling.

Almost reaching the top of the stairs Tommy saw the candlelight path leading up to Adam’s ‘playroom’. It was a multi-purpose room, Adam used it to jam in whenever friends would come over/ It also had a huge soft couch in it and three of Tommy’s favorite things; a fireplace, one huge big ass flat screen and Adam’s entire horror dvd-collection. The fact that the collection consisted of merely 6 dvd’s was not important to Tommy, it was the fact that Adam had bought them knowing how much he loved them that mattered.

He could see the door standing open, not much, yet enough to reveal a hint of what was happening behind it, that unmistakable warm orange glow of a sea of tea lights. Time seemed to slow down as soon as Tommy had reached to top of the stairs. Al sorts of thoughts, good thoughts, were running through his head. His heart rate sure had gone up again but hey, nobody knew beside Tommy and he didn’t seem to mind at all.

His right hand reached out for the doorknob, stopping halfway in mid-air for no reason, or so it seems. “Adam? Baby, are you in here?”  _What the fuck is wrong with my voice? What am I? Thirteen again?  
_

There was still no sound in the house, the only sound there was was the sound of his own voice when he spoke and the sound of his breathing. His right hand that was still hanging mid-air continued its movement towards to doorknob and pushed the door wide open. No way was he or could he ever have been remotely prepared for the scene that was revealed as he looked around the room.

A thousand and one tea lights and black and white candles were spread around the room, spreading their heat and playful glow around it. Here and there were vases with fresh black and white roses.  The screen on the flat screen showed the ‘press-play-to-start-the-movie-part’ of Velvet Goldmine and Tommy smiled when he saw the wine cooler next to ‘his’ place on Adam’s couch filled with his favorite beer _Pabst Blue Ribbon._ Yet the best part, _the_ ultimate best part was Adam was sitting in the middle of the room behind a huge burning ‘Missed U’ that was being formed by a substantial number of red tea lights. Tommy couldn’t believe how beautiful he looked, bathing in the warm glow of the candle lights, all Adam, pure and natural without a single mark of make up on him.

No way in hell Tommy will ever forget the look in Adam’s eyes, he’s pretty sure the same look is displayed all over his face. If he were to be asked to put it down in words he would describe it as such: _when a blind man meets an angel._ Without looking away from Tommy’s gaze Adam pulls out a Corona out of a wine cooler obviously hidden behind his back, pops the cap and brings the bottle to his lips in a very, very slow, hot and most definitely teasing way.

“Adam.”

Adam could clearly see Tommy's mouth move yet no sound came out of it, he watched him swallow, watched as he took a few deep breaths and melted away when that pink little tip of his tongue brushed over his lower lip, when he unwarily bit down on his lower lip before wetting his lips again. He was looking down at Adam like a kid in a candy store and Adam would have sworn he could see stars shine in Tommy’s eyes.

 _Oh God Tommy! Baby stop doing that thing with your lips, you have no idea what you're doing to me here._ Below the waistline Adam's cock however was very much so with the program as he was blossoming under all that blood flooding into him, transforming into their favorite role, that of becoming his Royal Highness. _Down bud, we’ve talked about this remember? Please stay down._ Adam shifted a bit in an attempt to try and hide the obvious bulge in his sweatpants. He wanted nothing more than to get up, walk over to Tommy, pull him up and make love right there and then on the floor with the man who was unknowingly testing out all of his self-control skills.

“Adam.” Tommy’s voice or was it a whisper finally came out loud enough to be heard as he fell to his knees, crawling over to Adam gently making his way over and around the candles. He made his way into Adam’s space ending sitting right in from of him their knees touching, their hands blindly finding each other.

“Fuck you Adam!” Tommy’s voice wasn’t hostile, it was loving and warm.

“Hi yourself.”

“What’s with all this?” It wasn’t a question exactly, merely stating a fact. Tommy’s brown eyes were filled with nothing but warmth, his hands on and around Adam feeling soft in a discovering kind of way.

“Too much?”

“Yeah… I mean… Oh fuck! No, not too much, well a bit too much though. This is a first for me. Damn this is so fucking embarrassing.”

“So, too much.”

“No! I’m embarrassed because no one has ever done this for me normally I’m the one doing all the… You know, all of this shit. Me being a man and all. Fuck! That didn’t come out right didn’t it?”

“Too soon?”

“I don’t know. Oh fuck! … Maybe… But I like it,” taking a step closer to Adam he took a deep breath,” I like it! I like it a lot, don’t fucking change this because of me.”

Adam’s heart starts doing what feels like a victory dance when Tommy’s words sink in as he feels Tommy’s fingers lacing up between his.  A lump starts to forms itself in his throat and he swallows softly because he so doesn’t want to cry over this even if Tommy words are the most romantic unromantic ones someone ever told him. Tommy liked it and he just explicitly asked him not to change. He’s been pulled out of this little time bubble in Adam-space by Tommy who is climbing into his lap.

“Hold me.”

“Baby, I’m euhm… I’m hard.”

“Don’t care. Hold me.”

“Tommy…” He can’t control himself, doesn’t want to either. Adam’s hands find their way around Tommy’s lower back as he seats himself in his lap.

“Hold me, Goddamn it! Hold me so tight until I can’t breathe anymore.”

Adam wraps his arms around Tommy frame hugging and holding and pulling him closer and closer, tighter and tighter. “That I can do.” 

Burying their faces in each other’s hair, in each other’s necks, breathing in the other's sent both men lose themselves in the moment, taking whatever the other was willing to give staying like that for quite some time. Nothing about their actions is sexual, quite the opposite. This, what they have right here is intimacy. A sacred intimacy; where no words are needed, where all that needs to be said is being said through a simple touch.

Adam was the first to break the sacred silence that was surrounding them; "I missed you so much baby."

"I missed you too honeybun, so fucking much."

And with that the already tight embrace in which they were glued to each other became even tighter, both men holding the each other even closer than before. Both lost in time. Adam's hardness had already drifted back to its lazy, happy, sleepy state when his legs had started to protest, his left one already asleep, his right one tinseling all over.

"Baby? You need to move, my legs are starting to become death weight."

"One more minute, I don’t wanna move.” Adam couldn’t see it, but he sure as hell could hear the pout on Tommy’s lips.

“Tommy please baby, it’s starting to hurt.”

“Oh sorry honeybun, didn’t mean to.”

"Don't be, I wouldn't be moving if it wasn't for my damn sleepy legs. Can you help me up?"

“Come on old man, let’s get you up.”

This however didn’t quite go as planned, Adam’s legs were both sleeping and it took him like forever to get some kind of feeling back in his feet. Tommy tried and tried to pull Adam on to his feet and every time as he was about to grab hold of Adam he would make these funny faces and Tommy would just burst out into a full blown laughter. After tentative number 15 or something, cause seriously who keeps count on these things, Tommy finally managed to pull or better said hold Adam up on his feet and guide him over to the couch. The debate on the difference between guiding and throwing someone on a couch would definitely be continued later on. Yet it could wait; now their priorities lay somewhere else, now it was time for them to reconnect.


	13. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Dedicated to a Birthday-girl ....

Adam was on the phone when he entered the kitchen looking for a drink, a bowl of chocolate ice-cream stood untouched on the counter. He couldn't help but smile as he overheard a part of the conversation. "Mommy...!! You know I love doing exactly that..." Adam's voice sounded just like a little kid and Tommy knew he only spoke like that when Leila was teasing him about something. They had such a close bond, Adam and his mom, teasing each other so many times, speaking in theses weird voices almost speaking a language of their own whenever they were alone. He remembered the first time he walked in on one of these conversations; he hadn't understood a damn thing about it. When he had asked Adam what the fuck that was all about, he had simply stated one needed Lambert genes to decipher the Lambert code.

He had picked a bottle of beer from the fridge, walking behind Adam to toss the cap in the bin he gently placed his hand on Adam's back to let him know he was standing behind him.

Adam had turned around at the touch, a smile appearing on his lips before leaning down pressing his lips to Tommy's forehead, moving his left hand behind his waist pulling him closer as he carried on with their conversation. "That's perfect mom! .... Love you too... Talk to you later. Bye." As soon as he heard Adam finish his conversation with his mom Tommy had unwrapped himself out of Adam's gentle hold. He had walked over to the counter picking up a spoon and Adam's ice-cream bowl before heading towards the double glass door that gave access to the wooden deck and the few steps down to the garden. He slowed down on the steps hearing the cracking of the wooden deck behind him, turning around to face Adam he slowly licked the melting ice-cream from the spoon. "Hey! Not fair... That's mine!" Adam tried to pout but failed as he watched Tommy lick his spoon.

"Nope.... It's mine now." Tommy said in the most casual of voices, taking another lick of the melting ice-cream, looking straight at Adam. _Oooh fucking look at him! How the fuck will I ever be able to control myself when he looks like that licking a spoon of all things!_ Adam could feel his groin come to life, he was well on his way to have a fully grown hard on in a matter of seconds. _I know bud, I know believe me I know. God how I would love to see him go down on you, on us._ "Baby.... Come on,” Adam pleaded, he was human after all and in being so very much susceptible to the sight in front of him.

"Nope, not good enough,” oblivious to Adam’s plea he took another lick from the ice-cream. "Tommy!" Adam was getting desperate.

"Adam?" Tommy looked at him through his bangs, trying to look all innocent and sweet. "Ratliff!!” Trying really hard to make it sound like he was about to lose his temper and succeeded quite well if Tommy didn’t take his mischievous smile into account. Tommy's eyes sparkled, playful mischief so clearly showing. "Lambert..."  His voice still sounding so sweet, almost innocently it couldn’t have been more contradictory.

"Give it back or so help me God I won't be responsible for my actions." Tommy smirked. "Am I supposed to be fucking impressed by that? Cause I'm sure as hell am not."

"Don't temp me…"

"I dare you… Do try something... "

As if they'd read each other's mind Tommy had turned around and started running down the stairs into the garden, the bowl of ice-cream flying through the air as Adam started chasing him.

Adam's legs may have been longer than Tommy's he was definitely faster. Chasing each other on the lawn; Adam cursing and swearing, promising he was slowly going to kill Tommy. Tommy on the other hand laughing out loud, looking over his shoulder now and again to see where Adam was, encouraging him in his own unique style. "That's all you got? Fucking wuss! Come on old man, man the fuck up will ya!"

A long 20 minutes or so later Adam was about to give up being almost out of breath as Tommy slipped, losing his balance. Eyes looking like they were locked on pray and with a final sprint he threw himself onto Tommy, sending them both crushing down in the grass. "Ha!! Gotcha! Now who's the wuss!?" Adam cried out his victory by unleashing a forceful tickling attack on Tommy's side and ribs making him cry out and wiggle underneath him, desperate to break free.

"Aaagh! ... Nooo! ...St ... Fuck! ... Stttt ... Stop! ... Adam!" Breathless, lost between full blown out laughter and the want to push off Adam was all he managed to get out. Somehow, eventually, he managed to slowly escape from Adam's _deadly_ assault, his brain trying hard to focus on the task at hand. _Payback_. Tommy knew all too well Adam was even more ticklish then him. He had one shot at this; the timing had to be right since Adam was not only bigger but also stronger than him.

Right there right then, Adam, caught himself in laughter in the heat of the moment, shifted or slipped or whatever onto Tommy's right side. He used all of this strength and moved to the left using both his hands to push Adam further to his right giving him leverage to make him move simultaneously.

Adam never saw it coming, one minute he was the one pinning Tommy down, tickling him ferociously the next second he was the one laying on his back screaming out like a girl as Tommy took his sweet revenge. His sides, just above the waistband of his jeans were his weak spots; even the slightest touch would still make him jump up at times. He had learned over the years to control it but only when he knew he was going to be touched. This however, a surprise attack, was way beyond his self-control powers. Laughter had literally took away all of his strength, unable to fight off Tommy's hands as he targeted his sides time after time. Some 15 minutes later both of them were so out of breath, sweaty from all the intense physical efforts and Adam’s stomach started to really hurt from laughing too much. Adam surrendered. "You… You win! St... Stop! You win!"

Tommy stopped almost immediately, a huge grin plastered on his face before he sunk down on Adam's chest, both of them catching their breath. "Remind me again, just how old are we exactly?" Brushing aa stray strand of hair out of Tommy's eyes Adam simply stated "You're the old man here baby, I'm always going to be younger then you." Adam's hands wandered onto Tommy's back, gently rubbing over his sweaty t-shirt.

"Even so, I won! Not bad for an old man wouldn't you say?"

"Whatever you say baby."

Tommy's head was resting on Adam's shoulder enjoying the gentle rubbing on his back. Eventually he pushed himself off just a bit so he'd make eye contact with Adam. His cheeks were still flushed from all their playing as he was sure so were his own. Adam's hair still sticking to his sweaty forehead and his freckles somehow stood out even more on his skin. _Goddamn honeybon you look so fucking beautiful like this._ Tommy moved his hands onto the grass just above Adam's shoulders, lowering his head and kissed Adam's lips. "I don't think your ice-cream has survived this you know."

"You know what this means right?"

"Hmm, does this mean I have to kiss and make up with you now?" He tilted his head a bit so he could look down at Adam through his bangs.

"Yeah! You do!" Adam faux pouted.

Tommy pressed his lips again against Adam's and again and again. It didn't take long for Adam to respond as he felt Tommy’s tongue licking over his lips opening up for Tommy. Soon they were fully making out in the grass. He tilted up his head giving Tommy full access to his neck enjoying every second of every kiss, lick and soft bite he was getting, very much aware of the reaction it was having in his pants.

When Tommy moved down to his collarbone, sliding down over his crotch in his movement he could feel he wasn't the only one getting hard. Memories from their first night together came back. _“No rushing, no pushing, no fucking you tonight or tomorrow or the next days until you’re ready, just us taking baby steps_ _together.”_ Adam had said and meant every word of it, yet he so wanted to take over right now, rolling Tommy on his back but he didn't as he could feel Tommy getting bolder, more confident. He lifted his hips just a bit, pressing his hardness against Tommy's, moving his hands onto his lower back, making contact, making him aware of his presence yet not dominate in any way.

Tommy moaned softly as he did this, pressing his own hardness down against Adam's. Moving just his hips so they rubbed against each other. Adam let go of Tommy's back, pushing himself up on his elbows. "Kiss me." They kissed, mouths open, their tongues brushing against each other's. Licking each other's lips as Tommy hips continued moving, pressing their hardnesses against each other. It felt so good, too damn good and he couldn't fight back the urge, the need, the want of thrusting back up.

He broke their kissing, dropping back onto his back, moving his right hand to Tommy's face, trailing his lips with his fingers. Tommy kissed, licked and eventually sucked at one of his fingers. Moving his legs so they were spread over Adam's, grinding his hips down harder. Adam looked straight into Tommy's eyes his voice hoarse, filled with lust. "Use me... Use my body baby.... Use me."

"Adam..." Tommy's voice might have sounded soft and somewhat unsure, his cheeks were flushed, his eyes filled with arousal.  "Use me baby... Please... It’s yours baby, I am your playground." His fingers were still there, touching Tommy's face, trailing his lips as he spoke. He raised himself on one elbow, sticking out his tongue and moving it as if he was making out with Tommy even if his tongue wasn't even close to Adam's.

The sight of seeing Adam beneath him, feeling Adam's hardness against his own was so powerful a deep moan escaped Tommy's lips. He pressed down hard against Adam as his tongue found Adam's fingers again, licking and sucking it as he started thrusting down against Adam, never breaking eye contact.

Adam's eyes flashed as he began thrusting against him, his eyes darkened even more. The view almost taking Tommy's breath away, the only thing he could do was hum and moan as he started to suck harder on Adam's finger.  "Tommy... Please... I'm close baby..."

With that he let go of Adam's finger. "Mmmmm,” was as all he was able to say as he felt Adam's hands on his ass, feeling Adam meeting his thrusts harder and harder.

"Sunshine..."

"Honey..." Tommy closed his eyes, tilting his head back, moaning loudly and thrusting down even harder, desperate himself for that spot on right-there friction. The heat, the rush, the fire started to consume Adam’s body. His breath erratic, panting heavily, there it was; his orgasm was about to explode. "Tommy..." His voice broke before he could say more, asking him not to close his eyes. He wanted to look in to Tommy’s eyes, he wanted Tommy to see how he lost himself in his orgasm remembering what Tommy had said to him as he had watched Adam come for the first time. _“Honeybun, that … That was incredible!”_   Tommy had looked at him as if he was blown away. It had warmed Adam’s heart so much, made him feel so small in a very good way, he knew right there and then he wanted to see that look in Tommy’s eyes again.

He didn't have time, feeling Tommy’s thrusts lose all rhythm in search of that final friction.

Tommy let out a moan so deep, so loud, so masculine his eyes flew wide open just in time to witness him fall apart as his orgasm hits. Adam watches as his mouth drops open, as he bites down on his lower lip, as the most beautiful blush deepens his already flushed cheeks, as he tilts his head even further, moan after moan escaping his mouth and it’s more then he can take. It unleashes his own orgasm, spreading his legs wider under Tommy’s, grabbing Tommy’s ass so he can push him down on his crotch holding him in place as he rides out his orgasm. When he finally comes down from the high buzz he looks straight into a pair of brown golden eyes.  “Fuck… That was … Adam…”

Before Tommy is able to say more Adam’s hands are all over him, pulling Tommy closer to him, his mouth covering his own. He understands, without words, what Adam is telling him through their kiss the second he feels Adam’s tongue against his own, as he swallows Adam’s moans just like Adam is swallowing his.

Their kiss slows down to lazy kisses and eventually their lips part definitively. Tommy rests his head again on Adam’s shoulder, moving his legs so that he’s resting between Adam’s legs again, feeling Adam’s feet on his calves. A hand brushes through his hair… His own hand slides under Adam’s t-shirt lazily playing with the chest hair around his bellybutton. Cum stained clothes or not, both of them are too lost in the afterglow, in each other’s warmth, none of them eager to move.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next update will be after the London Queenbert shows :) A girl has to set her priorities right .... :D  
> See you all in a week!!


	14. Chapter 14

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Real life kinda f*cked up my plans .. Am back though :)  
> Thank you all for the kudos and the comments, very much appreciated and very humbled by it all!

Somewhere between dreams Tommy could have sworn he heard something, a noise in a distance far far away. He brushes a strand of hair from his face, shifts a bit and is just about to go back to the land of the sleeping when he hears it again. It takes a few seconds before the connection between his ears and brain is properly functioning and he actually understands what it is. “Sunshine, wake up baby." _Ok, that’s not just some noise, definitely not a noise._ Tommy can't hold back the series of yawns as he opens his eyes and makes a poor attempt of activating his brain. When it finally comes online he recognizes those deep blue eyes looking back at him. "Hi sleepyhead, looks like we both fell asleep."

"Hmmmm, don't wanna move, am good this way,” Tommy mumbles between yawns as he rests his head again on Adam’s chest.

"Oh yeah? Try moving a bit, your dick will love you for it,” Adam teases.

Tommy does since his brain is still way too fried and he regrets it instantly; the dried cum in his pants almost ends up pulling out some of his pubes. "Aww! Fuck!! Eww and so gross!! But, so fucking worth it all things considered." The teasing look in his eyes speaks volumes and Adam can't help but to return the same mischievous look before making a funny face which sends them both in a giggle fest.

"Come on old man, get off of me," Adam asks. "I'm craving for some quality time with a hot shower here."  Tommy does in the end, the movements not being all that comfortable but he manages somewhat gracefully.

They pick up the reminents of Adam's ice-cream on their way to the house. Once inside Tommy insists Adam goes to have a shower first while he'll start fix them something to eat. He walks into the kitchen, adjust his pants somewhat - which in the end ends up making the scratchy feeling even worse and has him cursing out loud - and checks out what Adam has in his fridge and cabinets. 

Meanwhile upstairs in the bathroom Adam is not only enjoying the relaxing warm bliss of his shower; he’s also enjoying some quality time with his best buddy. Washing off the remnants of dried cum had quickly lead to memories from earlier in the afternoon to come floating back into his mind. Add to that the desire, the hunger and plaint want he has for his man and well let’s just say that in the end sometimes a man’s got do what a man’s got to do. He comes - moaning Tommy’s name - to the mental image of Tommy begging him over and over again to ‘please don’t stop baby, I’m so close … please come with me’. When he catches his breath again he realises he’s still holding his meanwhile soft cock in his hand before looking down. “I know bud. It’s gonna be you and me for a quite a while. Thank god we know each other well don’t we?”

As Adam steps out of his master bedroom wearing an old t-shirt and sweatpants the smell of cooking filling the house instantly makes his mouth water. He takes a few deep breaths climbing down the stairs trying to identify the flavours that are testing his culinary knowledge. The distinctive smell of garlic, prawns, tarragon and Vermouth make him smile; Tommy is making his infamous prawns. Leaning against the door frame he watches Tommy humming to a song in his head as he grabs a spoon, turns around in what looks like a badass-metal version of a ballet pirouette and tastes his sauce, humming approvingly.

Without moving from his spot Adam asks “Mmmm, smells amazing baby! Can I help with anything?”

“Nah, it’s all done honeybun. I turned down the cooker to a minimum so the food will stay warm,” he tells Adam. “You can set the table though and pick out a movie or something.”

“Dining table or coffee table?”

“’S all good for me babe, either way I’ll have you close. Whatever you want is fine by me."

“Aw baby, who would have guessed you could be such a romantic,” Adam teases before grabbing Tommy’s wrist and pulling him close for a kiss. “Now, get that sorry excuse of an ass up and into the shower. I wanna cuddle and eat with my boyfriend in front of the tv,” playfully slapping Tommy’s ass when he ushers him out of the kitchen. He’s about to lift the lid from the cooking pot to have a sneak taste when Tommy’s voice echoes through the house nearly causing Adam to drop it. “Lambert! Don’t you fucking dare and steal one! Put the goddamn lid back on and set the table!” _How the fuck does he do that? I swear the boy’s clairvoyant or something.  
_

Some half hour later both of them are seated on a sea of pillows in front of Adam’s coffee table with their backs against the couch melted to each other as much as possible without making eating impossible or messy. A wine cooler’s holding a bottle of white Montravel and a few candle lights makes it complete. “What did you chose?” Tommy asks between bites pointing to the remote of the DVD player.

“You’ll see baby. Ready?”

“Ready as I’ll ever be I guess. Come on man, hit the button will ya.” Adam does and watches Tommy’s face as the menu screen comes on. He can’t help but smile at the sight of Tommy’s face; his inner child enthusiasm is written all over it. “Dude! I never knew you had this? Where did you get this?”

“Got it in Munich, remember that music store having that sell-off on the way to the hotel? I ended up taking a little trip to it with Terrance and Sutan and there it was. I just couldn’t leave it, had to buy it.”

“Why the fuck didn’t you guys told me you were going? Dude! So not cool to leave a man behind. Now, if you want me to forgive you for that inexcusable conduct you’d better press that fucking play button man,” playfully elbowing Adam’s side on the way.

“Your wish is my command baby.”

“Am not your baby! Haven’t forgiven you you know, you haven’t pressed play yet.”

Adam makes a ‘fuck you too’ face, rolles his eyes and pressed play. Four seconds was all it took before both of them are humming the tune of The Muppets. Adam had selected the episode with Elton John first and they both almost choke when Elton is having his ‘duet’ with the crocodiles. Next comes the one with Alice Cooper followed by Paul Simon and Charles Aznavour to end with. Somewhere during the evening Adam almost peed himself when Tommy went off to do his own imitation of the Swedish Chef and the chicken. Tommy on the other hand nearly lost it to the ‘Intellectual Program’ during the Aznavour episode. 

Later that night cuddling closer to the man snoozing in his arms Adam felt the time right to ask that what he had been thinking about since basically day one. They had moved to the bedroom after having watched all four best of DVD’s of The Muppets, both their stomachs ached and tears had rolled down their faces on more than one occasion leaving Tommy to say, “Fuck baby, don’t know about you but I haven’t fell this beat in a long time. I had no idea laughing could cause this much fatigue.”  There was no way Tommy was already asleep and so he gathered up the courage to ask what has been on his mind ever since they got together as he gently let his fingers roam over Tommy's arm he whispered, "Baby? You awake?"

"I don't suppose you'd believe me if I said I talk in my sleep now would you?" Tommy jokes as he moves in Adam's arms so they are face to face. The room is too dark to actually see one and other facing each other to talk just comes naturally to the both of them. Lacing his right leg between Adam's, his right arm draped over Adam's abdomen, blindly searching and finding Adam's face he plants a kiss somewhere between his temple and the corner of his eye. They stay like this for some time simply each other’s warmth.

Tommy  feels the change in Adam’s body language as soon as he starts talking, the gentle hold around his frame became tenses and he can feel Adam’s palms starting to sweat. "I wanna talk to you about something. I have been thinking about it since like the first night we spend together,” Adam admitts before he goes quiet and stays that way.

"We promised remember," Tommy eventually reminds him gently. "No more hiding shit even if it hurts or feels weird and all. Tell me honeybun, let it out, whatever it is." Saying it in a calm, loving and supportive tone is one thing, feeling calm on the other hand is a whole other thing. He can't help it; doubt, fear and a whole bunch of other feelings end up showing their ugly faces in Tommy's mind.

Finally, after what had seemed like forever, Adam lets it out. " I want us to get tested baby."

 _Tested? As is tested tested? That can't possibly be what he means by getting tested right?_   "Say what baby?"

"Tested, you know like for aids and shit... I want, I mean don't get me wrong baby, I trust you baby ok, I really do. This has got nothing to do with trusting you or any lack there off because I trust you with my life and I don't want you to think I'm trying to push you into anything cause I'm not." He’s babbling, he knows it. Stopping now however is not an option. "It's just, I'm serious about us, I wanna be... I mean I'm yours, like exclusively yours and I wanna make a commitment to you. When the time comes I wanna make love to you without boundaries. I wanna feel you baby, as in really feel you, all of you for that matter you know? I wanna lose a part of myself in you and be able to give you the same thing hence my desire to get tested together."

 _Be able to give you the same thing...._ As the words sink in Tommy's heart begins to beat so fast, so loud he's pretty sure Adam could actually hear and feel it. He hopes he got Adam's words right and interpreted them the way he had meant for them to be. He tries; he really does but failes miserably at concealing the excitement and pure and utter disbelief in his voice.  "You wanna give me the same? Like, you mean I could have you like that? You'd let me top? But I thought... You said you didn't, like ever."

"What can I say, I don't kiss and tell. I may be open about a lot of things baby but what happens in my bed stays in my bed. This may come as a surprise and don't get me wrong; I am a top baby, hell I love it, am not gonna pretend otherwise. But that doesn't mean I'm a selfish prick. I cannot and will not expect my boyfriend to be denied or give up that pleasure. Sex is like a two way street you know, it's about giving and taking - no pun intended - plus I do like it." Adam's glad they have this conversation in the dark. The darkness of the night keeps Adam's secret safe and hides his burning cheeks. “Not all the time or like every week or so but I am open for it baby, I have bottomed for my lovers when the feeling's right you know and I want, I mean I would love you to… You know, when you’re ready baby.”

"Shit Adam, I don't, I don't know what to say... Fuck.. I mean this is huge like fucking seriously huge!,” Tommy exclaimes. The room goes quiet for a little while; both of them wanting to say something and at the same time give the other one space to express themselves. Eventually the quietness became a little awkward and Tommy brakes it. "Yes! Fuck yes baby I wanna get tested! God yes, like right the fuck now!"

"Why?"

"Say what?"

"Why yes?"

 "Are you fucking kidding me?!? Come on, move over and turn on the bedside lamp! I wanna be able to actually see you for this." Tommy feels the matrass shift under Adam’s movements and blinks when the light come on. He doesn't wait until Adam has repositioned himself and crawls into Adam’s lap. Tilting up Adam’s head so their eyes meet he can see the flushed cheeks, the vulnerability in his eyes. “Why? You really don’t know? Baby do you have any idea what you just told me?! What you just gave me? Fuck Adam, you offered yourself, _all_ of you, on a silver platter to me. Me! I don’t think you can even fathom how much it means to me and I’m not even talking about the who’ll be fucking who part. It’s way more than that and you know it. It’s about making a commitment to each other, about trusting each other in the most intimate ways, about caring and respecting the other. This is what love is all about baby, just like sex love is a two way street, you give and you take and I too wanna give myself to you, without boundaries, all of me, without holding back. I don’t know how else to put it but fuck Adam I love you so fucking much baby, you have no idea how much it means to me. So yes, I wanna get tested with you and on the other side, honestly baby I jerked off so many times to the fantasy of me topping you. You seriously have no idea what the fuck it does to my body even if right now I haven’t got a fucking clue on how to actually do it. Folks telling an ass is an ass are just idiots in my book but that is beside the point. The point is I too trust you with my life baby, let me give this to you too,” and seals it with a kiss.


	15. Chapter 15

The next morning Adam woke feeling like a 5 year old on a Christmas morning. They had talked a lot the night before, obviously about getting tested and how and when they would get their test done. It had been Tommy who suggested Adam would call his doctor. “You set up the appointment honeybun, you know when I have practice and gigs and shit so whenever you can set it up is fine with me, I’ll be here.” He did make house calls after all and that way no paparazzi could stick their nose into something utterly private.  They also talked about them, about Tommy’s fear of coming out – not the actual coming out itself but sharing that part of his life with the public eye - which as it turned out hadn't been the easiest thing; Tommy and expressing his feelings with words didn’t always go hand in hand while Adam on the other hand was an open book. They also talked about them taking baby steps, Adam kept promising over and over again he would not rush Tommy in any way, ensuring his lover that he alone set the pace of their lovemaking. In the end Tommy had reprimanded his boyfriend, telling him to stop thinking so much, he knew Adam respected him and would never even dream of pushing his limits.  Smiling at the memory he sneaked out of bed and after his usual morning routine he was on his way downstairs to call his MD or a least his secretary to setup an appointment for them both, after explaining the nature of his call and the requested house call an appointment was made for December 10th.

Being awake early he took the time to go through some of the things that needed his attention; paperwork and bills could wait, he had arranged that his dad had full power of attorney over all his affairs in his absence and knew without a doubt that everything had been taken care of. No, that what needed Adam’s attention were the thousands and thousands of pictures that were on his laptop. It was high time he sorted them out and archived them properly. As it often goes; what started out as a good resolution fell down the drain when he went through them one by one, smiling at them as the memories came back.

He was in the middle of going through the pics from a sightseeing-trip from Nagoya, Japan when his phone went off, the caller id revealing it was his MD calling. “Good morning Doc Goodman, to what do I own the pleasure?” he asked cheerfully. “Good morning Adam,” came an equally cheerful reply. Although their relation was no more than an old fashioned doctor/patient relation they had quickly developed a more amicable way of treating each other, both men had a warm, open and social personality and it happened naturally over time. “I’m calling regarding the appointment you have for December 10th, Sharon mentioned the request of a blood test. I’m on my way now to make a house call before I head over to the clinic and it would be a minor detour to pass by your place. If it’s ok with you I can be at your place in maximum 2 hours,” doctor Goodman offered.

“Oh, I guess so. Do you have what it takes for two tests?” Adam questioned. “Of course Adam, I always have a few extra kits with me,” came the reassuring response. “Ok then, see you in like two hours doc. Do you have the code for the gate?” “Not on me. I’ll call Sharon once I’m at your place, don’t you worry.” Both men said their goodbyes and Adam checked the time, learning it was almost 20 minutes past 11 o’clock. By the sound of it, or more accurately, by the _lack_ of it Tommy was still sound asleep. He got up and walked into the kitchen and started making fresh coffee.

A cup of fresh hot black coffee in hand he walked up the stairs. The plan was to wake up Tommy, or at least that was the plan, it, however quickly fell apart as he entered the room and stood in the doorway taking in the beautiful almost enchanting scene in front of him. The room bathed in a deep orange glow that not only looked very warm, it really had warmed the temperature in the room considerably. Somehow the reflection of the sun in the glass of water on Adam's bedside table ended up painting a dancing rainbow on the far end wall of the room; it covered almost the entire wall and a small part of the ceiling. As magnificent as it was, the thing that took Adam's breath away was the sight of the man sleeping _and_ snoring in his bed. Tommy lay on his left side on Adam's spot, slightly curled up in a ball, facing the window, with Adam's pillow clutched against his chest, his face resting an inch away of touching it. The orange glow of the midday sun also covered Tommy's face and in doing so it looked almost like he had a tan, a gorgeous one at that. The sheets seemed as though they were torn in two. One part, ‘Adam's part’, looked somewhat tangled around and between his legs, revealing a part of his thigh and a tiny part of his boxers while the other part, ‘Tommy's part’, loosely lay along his backside, slightly covering his right shoulder. His t-shirt had slid up during the night, giving Adam a glimpse of that porcelain white skin of his lower back and the right side of his ribs.

Unconsciously he licked his lips as he moved towards the bed. Having placed the cup on the nightstand, Adam went down on his knees in front of the bed, chin resting on his forearms he simply watched Tommy sleep. Minutes passed and effortlessly his own breathing had synched itself with the sleeping man’s. Tommy's hair was literally all over the place, even with him fast asleep, it stood up in all directions and Adam was pretty sure a bird could actually make its nest in it. A smile graced his lips at the thought. It wasn't a matter of how, it was a matter of _when_ he would reach out and touch;  touch that strain of hair that gracefully flowed in the air with every exhale, touch those eyes who -even when being closed - had a captivating effect on Adam. The way his eyelids moved, the way his eyelashes almost danced to whatever dream Tommy was having.

A mumble reached Adam's ears as he let his finger run over Tommy’s jawline, it startled him and he pulled back quickly, smiling to himself at the thought of waking up him man this way he reached out again. Tommy let out a sleepy grumble and opened his still-heavy-with-sleep-eyelids before a rough whisper was heard.  “Mmrrrgghhh. Whatcha doing?" "Watching you sleep," Adam whispered back truthfully. "Go back to sleep baby." Tommy closed his eyes again. A few seconds later a hand reached out blindly, searching and finding Adam's with a little help. "Too far... Want you closer," Tommy slurred as he let go of his hand. "Want you here," he mumbled as he patted the empty space in front of him. "Want you closer."

"Awww baby, hold on, I'm coming." Adam stood up and quickly got out of his sweatpants before climbing in bed. As soon as Tommy felt the matrass shift under Adam's weight he reached out, pulling, guiding and fitting their bodies together. "Mmmm, not close enough," he complained as he pulled Adam even closer until he could feel that closeness against his chest, that unmistakable feeling of another person's body and body heat. "This, this is way better," he mumbled happily against Adam's shoulder. "Just so we're clear, whatever you plan to do, moving from this spot is totally out of the fucking question." To emphasize his request even more, he threw his right leg over Adam's hips, it was by no means a strong enough hold, yet the message was loud and clear, one Adam heard perfectly as he pressed a kiss to Tommy forehead. Tangled in and around each other they lay in silence for a few moments. “What time is it?” came Tommy’s sleepy voice. “Almost noon baby.”

“Why did you leave me sleep? Where did you go anyway?” Tommy questioned as he shifted a bit, burying his face in the crook of Adam’s neck. “Woke up early, couldn’t bring myself to wake you up sunshine. Went downstairs and booked an appointment for our test and the best thing is it got rescheduled to today. Doc should be here in one hour, give or take. Turned out he already had appointment in the neighbourhood,” Adam explained. “Made you a cup of coffee baby, you want it?”

Tommy moaned at the mention of the word coffee and sniffed the air, breathing in deeply. “Mmmmmmm…. Gimme!” Turning his head toward Tommy Adam tried not gloat too much as he spoke. “No can do baby, you told me yourself that moving from this spot is out of the fucking question.” “Fucker! I hate you you know that,” Tommy spat out, no heat at all in his voice. “ I know baby, I hate you too,” Adam returned teasingly “Now be a good brat and move so I can reach your coffee.”

An empty cup later Tommy had slowly but surely achieved a decent state of awakeningness and that had to be celebrated with a proper good morning kiss. One kiss lead to another and another and gradually became a lazy, sleepy make out session. Soon enough the lazy sleepy part got replaced by a hungry passionate one. Neither aimed to permanently dominate, both took the lead at some point, dominating when needed only to follow the lead of the other when they switched.  Adam found himself on top of Tommy, somewhat pinning him down when he handed over the reins to his lover, as much as he loved being in charge he couldn't deny that being at Tommy's mercy so to speak did incredible things to him, it was such a huge turn on to him to see, feel and above all hear the possessive sounds Tommy made when he was in control.  Following Tommy’s lead he let himself be rolled back onto his back, surrendering unconditionally to Tommy’s kisses, nibbles and bites.

When Tommy shifted to reach the other side of Adam’s neck their groins rubbed together in just that right way, in that oh so perfectly good way, in that oh-yes-gimme-more-way. It wasn’t a moan that escaped his lips; it was a growl, a howl and something else all at once. It was unlike any sound he ever made, filled with lust, hunger and pure need. “Baby… Tommy,” he pleaded. Tommy silenced him with a finger on the lips. “Shhht, don’t move baby. Let me.” As if more proof was needed he pressed their groins together, erasing all possible and non-existing doubt in Adam’s mind. “You,” Tommy spoke hoarsely as he pressed his finger into Adam’s chest. “This is all your fault. I’m holding you personally responsible for this kink I’m developing; I really start to love creaming my pants.”

“Oh yeah?” Adam teased back. “And who says that’s my fault? I can say the same thing from you, you know. “Really?” Tommy grinned back after all, two could play this game and with that thought in mind Tommy set a succulent sweet teasing grinding pace. “What are you trying to say here honeybon? You want me to pull away? Is that it? You want to deal with it on your own don’t you? Grabbing that big cock of yours and work it like a pro. Just tell me baby and I’ll stop right now.” To emphasize his point Tommy stilled his movements which caused Adam to whimper at the sudden loss of friction. “Don’t stop,” he pleaded. “Please don’t stop baby.”

“Your wish is my command baby,” Tommy smiled as he resumed his rhythm only this time the pace wasn’t teasing, it was a straight line all the way to the finish. They didn’t kiss; instead they locked onto each other’s eyes finding all they needed in the other one’s gaze. It didn’t take long before Adam grabbed Tommy’s ass, he couldn’t hold back anymore, no matter how hard he tried he couldn’t ignore his instinct as he pulled and pushed Tommy closer.  His hips had an agenda of their own and moved on their own accord in search of more friction. “Don’t stop baby… Please don’t stop,” Adam pleaded as he grinded harder and harder into Tommy’s movements, giving back as much as he was getting. “So close baby… I’m… I’m gonna…”

“Wait for me honey! Wait for me, I’m right behind you,” Tommy managed out, _barely._ Shifting somewhat, he used his left hand to push Adam’s hip down, arching his back more, grinding his hips in that circular way that never, _never_ failed him and damn did it pay off. It had always felt amazing with a woman – no lie – but this, _this_ was so much better; a hard on to rub against was so much better, pushing all of Tommy’s buttons and more all at once. “Oh fuck! God … Oh yeah, that’s it …  Adam… Let… Let go,” he panted, pleaded. One, maybe two or three more thrusts, at the most, would do the trick. Whatever that sound was that escaped Adam’s mouth told him all he needed to know, they would reach the finish line together. “Come on baby, that’s it…  Come for me baby! Come on!” Tommy breathed out, thrusting into Adam for all his worth.

 

 

***Ding Dong***

 


	16. Chapter 16

The cheerful and _loud_ sound of the doorbell made both of them – _literally_ \- jump out of their skin, both so lost in their moment. Tommy collapsed on top of Adam screaming out his frustration, “NOOOO!!! FUCK!! FUCK!! FUCK!!” Instead of riding out the wave of pleasure that was just _there_ ,  he found himself slamming the breaks like a madman in a desperate attempt not to hit the metaphorical wall that was right in front of him;  he was going to hell instead of coming to heaven and it was by no means a pleasurable feeling. “Oh come the fuck on!! Fucking fucked up double fuck!” he cussed before he rolled off of Adam, reaching for his groin. “This fucking hurts goddamn it!” 

“I know! Tell me about it,” Adam whined back feeling that same, very painful discomfort; palming and readjusting his junk to find some sense of relieve.  “I think it’s the doc baby.” Rolling further on the bed the only thing Tommy managed to get out was, “Don’t give shit! Dude’s got some fucking bad timing!” under his breath. “Can you get it baby? Don’t think I can walk properly right now. I swear if my nuts or Freddy suffer permanent damage here I’m fucking sewing his rich ass.” Adam had managed to stagger somewhat ungracefully to his feet, adjusting his hard on in his boxers once more before pulling his pants back on when it registered in his brain.  _Freddy? He calls his dick Freddy?_

Adam tried – he really did - but to no avail and no matter how hard he tried, laughter end up filling the room. “Freddy?” he managed out “As is Freddy Krueger Freddy? Aww baby, only you baby, only you can pull that off.” Crossing his arms across his chest, putting up his best go-fuck-yourself-attitude with matching pout Tommy countered; “Dude!! Can we please not discuss the how or why of my dick’s name when I’m like -  hell WE - are gravely suffering here?” Adam in the meantime had closed the gap between them pulling him against his chest. “Baby, you can call your dick Godzilla or Ducky Duck or like whatever, I will love him no matter what. He’s a part of you and therefor equally important to me. Now come on, behave a little and let’s go see the doc ok?” 

“Just so you know mister, you are so gonna share your dick’s name later on and please,” waving one hand dramatically under Adam’s nose while struggling to pull up his sweatpants. “Don’t even try to look offended and go all ‘oh but my dick doesn’t have a name’ on me cause I’m so not buying it! Hell even your fans named the dude, isn’t that right _Bulgie?_ ” Tommy knew, he goddamn knew he played dirty when he leaned over and addressed that last part directly to the ‘little’ bulge in Adam’s pants.

“Oh God! You little fuck! You keep this up and Freddy won’t be the only one with permanent damage now will you just shut up and get ready before the doc rings the bell again.” Adam complained. It took almost every bit of willpower he had to make his lower extremities move away from Tommy and move in direction of the doorway. “Hey! Wait for me!” Tommy yelled as he run to catch up with his boyfriend. Taking and lacing Adam’s fingers between his own he was ready, ready to take a huge step in their still very young relation. “Ready baby?” 

“Ready as I’ll ever my little scarecrow,” Adam fondly replied emphasizing his endearment by messing up Tommy’s hair even more. Raising his hands Tommy try to get a feel of the state his hair was in. “Scarecrow hair huh. That bad?” "Totally, looks good on you though. Very fierce baby," Adam genuinely said. "Don't you dare laugh," Tommy threatened, narrowing his eyes in the meantime. 

"Am not… Really baby, I’m not laughing." The words, the combination of Tommy's hair, the pouty face and fake offended voice was too much. Adam’s laughter filled the house again and Tommy punched Adam's arm, _hard_. "Fucker! I so hate you!" The tone of his voice however told a whole other story. Adam's laughter being what it is; infectious as hell, it didn't take Tommy long to join Adam in a laughter fest as both of them went down the stairs. 

Adam was still laughing when he went to open the front door. “Hi Doc, sorry to have kept you waiting.” The not so subtle bulge in Adam's pants gave the good doc a pretty accurate idea on why he had been standing outside the house for a good ten minutes, give or take a few. "No sweat Adam, smartphones are a wonderful invention to pass the time aren't they?" doctor Goodman winked. "Yes, yes they are indeed," Adam answered truthfully; before taking a step back to wave the doctor in and closing the door behind him. 

The usual small talk was made on the way to the living room which showed a visible nervous Tommy seated in the corner of couch, a pillow clutched in his lap. "Doc, meet Tommy, my boyfriend," Adam glowed. "Sunshine, meet doc Goodman." "Don't get up," he spoke as he walked over to shake his hand, Tommy nodded thankfully not having to show hard on he was still sporting when he shook the offered hand. 

In the end all three were seated, Adam had taken place next to Tommy, his left hand resting on Tommy's thigh while Tommy's right hand was doing the same on his thigh and a silence had fell upon them, it was doctor Goodman who broke it. "So Adam, tell me. Why am I here?" Both men turned to look at each other, a smile on both their lips as they both simultaneously squeezed the other one's thigh. "Tommy and I want to get tested. Aids and any other STD, the whole nine yards basically,” Adam spoke. 

“Of course Adam, that can be arranged. I can take a sample of you both today and you’ll need to redo one in three months to be absolutely sure, until then I highly recommend you keep on using condoms,” the doctor explained and they both nodded in agreement. “Let’s get the paperwork out of the way first before I stick a needle in both your arms.” The paperwork was a simple formality, doctor Goodman agreed to give them both the result of their test over the phone instead of having them come over to the practice. “You can both call me in six days, I should have the results by then and before any of you ask; no I will not tell you the result of the other. As your doctor I’m bound to respect the confidentiality and I have no intention of breaking that oath. I can however, if you specifically ask, email you the results _after_ I talked to the pair of you separately.” “I have no secrets from Adam, well not anymore anyway, I’d have no problem with him seeing the results of the test, whatever the outcome,” Tommy spoke suddenly. Turning to Adam, he went on; “I’ve always been safe before baby, I’m willing to bet every guitar I own on it, my test will come back negative.” 

“I believe you sunshine and I can promise you the same. My last test was done little over a year ago. I had one done the next day and again three months later when I noticed the condom got torn one day and my tests came back clean. Plus you may not know this, but you know those medial test the label makes us have every three months? I know for a fact they equally check for STD’s.” “They do?” Tommy asked surprised. “Yeah, they do. It’s standard procedure and shit. It didn’t feel right baby taking this step together with them sticking their noises in something that is between the two of us. So that’s why I wanted to have a test of our own, I want to give you this properly you know,” Adam went on. “I want to do the right thing by you.” 

Tommy didn’t know what to say for a few seconds; sure enough he had always suspected, as well as everyone else in the band, the medical exams were an all-inclusive package so to speak, yet it was hearing Adam say he wanted to do the right thing by him that made his heart swell with love. “Can I go first?” he asked nervously, “I want to get it over and done with.” 

“Sure thing Mister Ratliff, euh sorry, _Tommy,_ ” the doctor corrected himself. Tommy had made it clear when they’d filled in the paperwork he had no problem going by his first name. “Do you prefer the left or the right arm?” “Whatever, don’t have a preference really,” he shrugged before taking a few deep breaths. “You alright baby?” Adam asked concernedly. 

Breathing out deep and slow Tommy moved closed to Adam in search of comfort and moral support. “It’s just, ever since my dad… It brings back memories you know,” he admitted. “Aw baby, it didn’t cross my mind honestly. Tell me what it is you need,” Adam offered, an arm protectively draped around Tommy’s waist. “Can you like, talk to me and stuff, take my mind off it?” 

“That I can most surely do sunshine,” Adam said while he repositioned himself behind the anxious man. “Close your eyes for me baby and doc, make sure to cover your ears when you take his blood,” Adam said unapologetically. He was going to take Tommy’s mind to a whole other world. “Ready when you are Tommy, just take your time,” doctor Goodman spoke. Adam nodded and began his kissing Tommy’s neck, working his way up to his ear, whispering dirty things into Tommy’s ear; “Imagine this baby, in like four months’ time, you and I can begin making up a plan to bless every corner of every room around the house as well as the pool and garden, marking our territory as we go or should I say as we fuck each other into the ground. I’ll be finally able to feel you baby, inside of me, all around me – all of it -  pounding into me as I beg for you to take me deeper, harder. Feel it baby, feel how hard I am just by thinking about it, think about how much harder you can make me,” Adam breathed out in his ear. Tommy was so focused, so lost and high on Adam’s voice. So lost on feeling what Adam was describing he never felt the little sting when the needle broke through his skin. 

“There you go Tommy, all done.” With a deep red blush on his cheeks Tommy didn’t dare look at the doctor, instead he became fascinated with a non-existent defect in the fabric of his grey sweatpants. “I’m sorry,” he mumbled. “No harm done Tommy. I have what I want and you didn’t feel a thing, so whatever Adam did or said, it worked like a charm. Now Adam, stop grinning like an idiot and get over here, it’s your turn.” All and all it didn’t even take a full two minutes to get the two test tubes filled with Adam’s blood, a small band aid on the inside of his, of their arms, were the only reminders. “I’m all done here,” carefully having placed the test tubes for each of them in the designated labelled bag and properly packed to be send out to the lab doctor Goodman took his leave. Tommy and him shook hands and Tommy promised to call in six day, as soon as the practice was open to know and have his results. 

Walking the doctor out and shutting the door Adam couldn't think of anything else then getting back to picking things up where they had been left off, before the bell had ruined what would have been a mind blowing orgasms. He wasn't even aware of the fact he was leisurely running his hand over his rapid growing groin on the short walk from the door to the living room. He was more than half hard when he found Tommy staring out into the garden, an amused expression all over his face, mumbling something he couldn't quit make out from this distance. It wasn't until he got closer he could make out the words, wondering what had gotten in to him. "Come on little man, you show 'em who's boss!!" Tommy cheered. "Yeah, that's it! Come on now, one more try... Come on! You can do ,it," Tommy continued.

 Feeling arms close in around his waist, he leaned back without thinking, letting himself melt in the familiar embrace that was Adam's, smiling when he felt 'something' poking him in the lower back. "What you're looking at baby?" Adam enquired. "Look at 11 o'clock baby, at the tree with the broken branches; there's a kiddie bird getting his first flying lesson," he pointed out. "See him?"

 Scanning the area Tommy had pointed out he rapidly found the little bird flapping his wings, he wasn’t all that hard to miss considering his bright yellow breast. “Oh I see him! What do you think it is? Don’t recall ever seeing a bird like that around here.” Adam simply stated as he joined Tommy observing the little one from behind the window; it was quite a funny scene to observe. Their little feathery friends kept on flapping his wings at an impressive speed, rocking back and forth on the branch. Both his parents were flying close by encouraging him on.  After what seemed like forever - when in reality it wasn’t even a full minute later – the little bird literally took a leap of faith and jumped off his branch. “Oh my! Fuck!! Adam, is he ok?” Tommy almost jelled, he was about to open the glass door when Adam caught a yellowish movement in the corner of his eye, as he turned his head toward the movement he couldn’t help the cheerful ‘sweeeeeeeet’t that escaped his lips. “Baby! Look! I found him and he’s doing alright.” Tommy returned to the warmth of Adam’s embrace and both watched in silence how their little friend was flying higher and higher with his parents. 

"Now, where were we?" Adam eventually whispered in Tommy's ear. The warmth of his ghosting breath made him shiver in the process. "Were we doing something? Damn, I can't remember," Tommy whispered back as he turned around in Adam's embrace. "Old age you know, I'm gonna need your help to remember."

 "Old age huh? I'll show you old age pops," Adam whispered back in a low tone before crushing his lips against Tommy's, pouring every bit of want and need and love he felt in them. Feeling arms and hands tightening their hold around and on his body, he pressed forward effectively pushing Tommy against the window. The clock ticked as hands roamed, t-shirts got tangled, tongues danced, air was exchanged, hungry moans escaped and both started to move - in perfect synch - to a choreography one could only feel in direction if the couch. "I want you," Adam breathed out between kisses. "So much baby. Let me take care of us... Please..." 

Tommy tensed up, just for a second or two, yet so suddenly it hadn't go unnoticed. A blush deepened the flushed colour on his cheeks even more when he looked up meeting Adam's eyes. "Sorry...," was all he was able to get out before Adam's lips lovingly forced him into silence. "There's nothing to be sorry about baby, you've done nothing wrong. It won't be the last time either, I kinda expected it at some point or another and that's ok." Adam assured him, his eyes so open, so full of honesty and respect. "I won't think any less of you for stopping..." He didn't get any further, Tommy's fingers interrupted what he was about to say next. Those same fingers ended up trailing along his face. "Have I told you already just how much I love you?" Tommy whispered. "I trust you baby, I really do... Can you go back to what you were doing?" 

Adam was more than happy to oblige as he guided Tommy on his back with the sole intention of worshipping every bit of Tommy he would allowed to have. Seconds became minutes, one minute became ten minutes, ten minutes became half an hour as Adam moved around, and dedicating his undivided attention to every inch of skin of Tommy's face, neck, arms and hands he was offered while keeping his hands in total family-friendly areas. 

Every nerve in his body was on edge, all of his senses working in overdrive, his skin burned, Freddy felt and throbbed like he was about to explode and Tommy wouldn’t have traded it for anything in the world. “More... Need more baby.”


End file.
